Countries with long avarage working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
to agree or disagree with the
statement
that
Countries
with long
avarage
Correct your spelling
average
working time are more economically successful than those
countries
which do not have long working time is an important issue to discuss . First ,l will present some argumentative supporting
this
statement
, after which , some aspects against that will be discussed. On the one hand , many people agree with
this
statement
for many important reasons . The most significant is that If
countries
have long average working hours, it can have a positive impact on economic success. The long working hours can increase productivity and innovation, driving the economy towards growth.
However
, other factors
such
as quality of life and work-life balance should
also
be considered.
On the other hand
other people . Oppose
this
statement
for many reasons. The most important is that Production is weak and simple
for example
same
countries
poor
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
don't have products .
Countries
that have no working hours may face economic and social challenges.
On the other hand
, these policies could lead to a better work-life balance and improve the quality of life for citizens. In conclusion, I strongly agree with the idea supporting
this
statement
because its
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
sutweigh
Correct your spelling
outweigh
its drawbacks,
for instance
, products straight ,
as well as
the
quality's
Change the noun form
qualities
quality
show examples
of products .So it leaves me no doubt that
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
that
Countries
with long
avarage
Correct your spelling
average
working time are more economically successful.
Submitted by almeem on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which is a strong structural foundation. However, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to the next to improve coherence.
task achievement
Your main points need to be more thoroughly supported with relevant, specific examples. Try to include real-world examples or factual data to make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
While you provide arguments for both sides, your points can be clearer and more well-developed. Consider expanding on each idea to provide a more comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
You have structured your essay with an introduction and conclusion, which helps organize your arguments effectively.
task achievement
You addressed both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced approach to the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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