You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below gives information about the preferred leisure activities of Australian children. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown. You should write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The graph below gives information about the preferred leisure activities of Australian children. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown. You should write at least 150 words.
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The bar chart presents the percentage of
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
leisure activities of
Autralian
Correct your spelling
Australian
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids
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aged 5-14 years.
Overall
Linking Words
, both
boys
Use synonyms
and
girls
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are tend
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tend
show examples
to use their leisure
time
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for watching TV or videos.
Boys
Use synonyms
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
to do outdoor activities like
scateboarding
Correct your spelling
skateboarding
and bike riding rather than
girls
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. In detail, we can see that
gilrs
Correct your spelling
girls
did not spend their free
time
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too much
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
scateboarding
Correct your spelling
skateboarding
, they only
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
about 20 per
cent
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for that. Meanwhile,
boys
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spend almost 40 per
cent
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of their
time
Use synonyms
to do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
scateboarding
Correct your spelling
skateboarding
. After watching
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
and videos,
doing
Verb problem
playing
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electronic or computer
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
attractive for both
boys
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and
girls
Use synonyms
, they
preffered
Correct your spelling
prefer
to spend more than 60 per
cent
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of their
time
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
playing.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
girls
Use synonyms
lead in
art
Fix the agreement mistake
arts
show examples
and
craft
Fix the agreement mistake
crafts
show examples
. They
use
Verb problem
spend
show examples
more than 50 per
cent
Use synonyms
of their
time
Use synonyms
to do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
that,
while
Linking Words
boys
Use synonyms
only spend about 20 per
cent
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
art and crafting.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words boys, girls, time, cent with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • leisure activities
  • popularity
  • participated
  • outdoor activities
  • electronic entertainment
  • gender differences
  • age trends
  • artistic activities
  • cultural trends
  • educational influence
  • group activities
  • individual activities
  • social skills
  • comparison over time
  • statistics
  • surprising findings
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