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Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Society is based om rules and laws.If individuals were free to do whatever they want to do,it could not function To what extend do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

#society #om #rules #laws #individuals #function
To function as a community,
rules
 and
laws
 are needed. Some critics argue that if the people have absolute freedom, it could not
worked
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work
show examples
. I strongly believe that having
rules
 and
laws
 helps us to build a strong
functionable
Correct your spelling
functional
 society.  To construct, instructions are needed.
Same
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The same
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methology
Correct your spelling
methodology
 applies to
a
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apply
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civilization.
Create
Wrong verb form
Creating
show examples
laws
, and
rules
has
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have
show examples
 the purpose
to build
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of building
show examples
 a better future.
Therefore
, having a strong productive community brings benefits, one of them
maintain
Wrong verb form
maintaining
show examples
 the peace. If a society does not have it, chaos would
appeared
Change the verb form
appear
show examples
 and disorder would take relevance. An example of
this
 is the rule of in order to drive,
driver's
Correct article usage
a driver's
show examples
 license is needed. If a
citizens
Fix the agreement mistake
citizen
show examples
 drives without it and
don't
Correct subject-verb agreement
doesn't
show examples
 know the
rules
 of how to drive, it can be dangerous provoking car
crash
Fix the agreement mistake
crashes
show examples
 and fatal accidents.
Therefore
, is vital to live in a world where
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
 and
laws
 are implemented. We have seen that it works.
The humans
Correct article usage
Humans
show examples
 adapt to every situation and maintaining
this
 legal system
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 to maintain order.
Moreover
, having a structure keeps enhancing the world. In conclusion, having a
systems
Correct the article-noun agreement
system
show examples
 where
laws
 and
rules
 are applied brings more benefits than drawbacks. One of them is that supports
to maintain
Change the verb form
maintaining
show examples
 peace
within
Change preposition
among
show examples
 citizens.
Hence
, I strongly believe that we could not function without it.
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task achievement
Overall, your essay should delve deeper into counterarguments and address them to present a balanced view. This will help in boosting the 'task achievement' score.
coherence cohesion
Use more connecting words and phrases to transition smoothly between sentences and paragraphs, which will elevate the flow and maintain reader engagement.
task achievement
Adding more relevant examples to support your points will significantly strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing.
coherence cohesion
A variety of sentence structures can enhance readability and make your essay more engaging. Try mixing simple, compound and complex sentences.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly presents your argument, setting a clear stage for the rest of the essay.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces your stance, giving the essay a strong ending.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples that illustrate your points, enhancing the essay's credibility.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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