Music play an important role in society, others think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent years, there has been an unprecedented surge in public musical interest, sparking extensive discussions regarding its implications for humankind. Some advocate that
music
Use synonyms
has a crucial impact on human societies,
while
Linking Words
others contend that embracing
music
Use synonyms
for the majority of citizens solely means entertainment. From my perspective,
although
Linking Words
music
Use synonyms
brings several potential merits
such
Linking Words
as pleasure and recreation, other advantageous aspects should not be underestimated.
To begin
Linking Words
with, one compelling argument in favour of listening to
music
Use synonyms
merely for entertainment is that it is conducive to releasing individual pressure and resonating with musical content. Nowadays,
music
Use synonyms
is universally acknowledged as a powerful tool to shatter despair and frustration. Engaging in melody provides people with tranquil and comfortable experiences to reduce the pressure accumulated in arduous professional tasks and boring daily lives, thereby mitigating negative mental influences and obtaining extra pleasure and happiness.
For example
Linking Words
, when individuals struggle to complete what they are going through, specific genres of
music
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as blues or pop
music
Use synonyms
, to a great extent, contribute to alleviating their mental suffering and decreasing relevant stress.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, for those with empathetic ability, the involvement of melody in their lives facilitates a broader resonation between individuals and what
music
Use synonyms
wants to express.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the effects of
music
Use synonyms
transcend far beyond recreation, and people should pay attention to other benefits it brings.
First,
Linking Words
as one of the most significant art patterns,
music
Use synonyms
results in unity and cooperation among disparate communities. It contributes to social and historical exchanges, allowing individuals to explore and appreciate literature, customs, and cultural and historical heritage.
For instance
Linking Words
, by listening to native songs and comprehending the nuances of lyrics expressions, citizens can gain deeper insights into the history, fundamental values, and worldviews of some communities.
In addition
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
can
also
Linking Words
enrich individual cultural understanding, which establishes a robust foundation to more readily integrate into the interconnected and globalized world. In conclusion, despite recognizing the profound significance of
music
Use synonyms
in entertaining people, I once again reaffirm my viewpoint that its role surpasses the single pleasure characteristic. Listening to
music
Use synonyms
facilitates frequent and meaningful cultural and historical interactions, making communal integration a more straightforward process.
Submitted by nikolopup on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Although you have provided excellent coverage of the topic by discussing both views and giving your own opinion, try to include more specific examples to strengthen the argument. For instance, mentioning a particular culture or a specific event where music played a role in uniting people.
coherence cohesion
To further ensure the essay flows smoothly, consider transitioning between paragraphs using slightly more diverse connectors. This can enhance readability and clarity.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a strong logical structure, making it easy to follow your arguments and understand your perspective.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, clearly outlining and summarizing your points.
task achievement
Your response to the task is thorough, discussing both views and providing a well-rounded opinion.
task achievement
The ideas are expressed comprehensively, with clear reasoning supporting your statements.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: