Task 2: Many countries have the same shops and products. Some consider it a positive development, whereas others consider it negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In some
nations
, there are numerous similar factories
and items
. It is a beneficial development according to
some individuals while
others assume it has many drawbacks. In this
essay, I will discuss both viewpoints and give my personal opinion at the end
.
There are two reasons why many countries
have the same shops
and products
is a positive development. Firstly
, customers may find it easier to make purchases when some factories
and items
are globalised. Because of similar shops
and products
, it allows customers from different areas to access those products
which were previously unavailable to them. For example
, in 1974, people who lived in Vietnam could not buy Sony’s camera. However
, these days they can purchase Sony’s camera easily due to
the US and Vietnam having the same shops
and products
. In addition
, some factories
are built
more and more in some Add a missing verb
being built
nations
which provide
more jobs for local employees. If some Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
nations
have the same shops
and products
to produce, marketing
, Replace the word
market
sale
and manage so Replace the word
sell
that is
the reason why the unemployment rate in these nations
will reduce
Some consider it a downside development if many countries
have the same shops
and products
because of
two different reasons. First of all, the Change preposition
for
environment
will be polluted due to
the increase in production. When producing more items
for the global market, it takes more resources so the environment
will be polluted. Secondly
, if developing countries
have the same products
as developed countries
, they will not create local products
and focus on selling international products
. It will lead to the
dependence on Correct article usage
apply
oversea
Fix the agreement mistake
overseas
nations
and loss of special tradition
.
In my opinion, I think there are numerous similar Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
factories
and items
in many countries
that will provide a lot of benefits including more jobs, convenience
for customers. Correct word choice
and convenience
However
, they need to save the environment
through using eco resources and limit
carbon dioxide. Wrong verb form
limiting
In Particular
, some countries
need to manage the import of international products
in order to focus on developing local products
.
In conclusion, in recent years globalization is
very popular in many Wrong verb form
has become
nations
so it leads
to having the same stores and Wrong verb form
has led
items
. It has both drawbacks and benefits, however
, the government needs to control import products
in order for the unemployment rate to decrease while
the quality of the environment
can be increased.Submitted by nguyenhoanganhquan918 on
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task achievement
While your essay covers both viewpoints comprehensively, you could develop your ideas a bit more deeply in certain parts, especially in the second body paragraph.
task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to illustrate your points, as they help strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on some minor grammatical issues and improve the clarity of expression in certain areas to enhance coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to demonstrate linguistic range and ability.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which aids in maintaining a logical structure.
complete response
You have successfully addressed both viewpoints, providing a balanced discussion.
logical structure
Your arguments are generally coherent and your points are well-organized throughout the essay.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
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