‏In some countries, university students live far away from home and in another city or country while studying. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

#‏in #countries #university #students #home #city #country

In today's world, the debate surrounding education has become a central topic of public discourse. It is evident and noteworthy that university

students

living far away from

home

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

become a common phenomenon.

While

acknowledging its merits and drawbacks, I am more inclined

towads

Correct your spelling

toward

its

Replace the word

it's

it is

show examples

being positive. In support of its upsides, my stance is primarily shaped by its logical coherence that

students

foster economic growth by living far from

home

This

stance is firmly grounded in the belief that

students

need to spend more money and are more inclined to get a part-time job. A significant study from Hong Kong University confirmed that

students

who live far away from

home

receive more financial support than

students

who live close by,

further

reinforcing

this

view. It is

also

important to consider that they would become more independent, largely by doing laundry and paying

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their bills. In

this

way, they could cultivate more skills in order to adapt to society after graduation.

Therefore

, there are numerous compelling arguments supporting

this

issue.

On the other hand

, there are an array of demerits behind the phenomenon, including the

nostagia

Correct your spelling

nostalgia

, especially for those living in other countries. The basis of

this

view depends on the fact that people experience isolation and loneliness when they are alone in an unfamiliar environment.

However

, it is crucial to recognize that

this

kind of loneliness is fixable.

For example

, by making friends or having

home

-style cuisine.

For instance

, a recent government analysis showed that Chinese

students

who study abroad in Canada reported a higher rate of happiness than

students

in England, mainly

due to

the quality of Chinese restaurants. In conclusion, after thoroughly examining both sides, my conviction in the assertion that university

students

live

Correct pronoun usage

who live

show examples

far away from

home

gain more pros than cons remains strong.

Submitted by 994620786 on Tue Jun 25 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Ensure that all your main points are sufficiently developed and supported with clear examples. While you provided general support, adding more detailed examples could enhance your argument.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to any small language inaccuracies. While they don’t significantly impact comprehension, refining these will make your essay even more polished.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear and balanced discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of living far from home, then leans towards the positive. This shows thorough consideration of the issue.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs explaining both views, and a conclusion that reaffirms your stance. This logical flow enhances readability.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
As mass communication and transport continue to grow, societies are becoming more and more alike leading to globalization. Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity. Do you agree or disagree with the statement? Take a stand and build up your argument.
Over recent years, globalization has emerged as the leading trend behind the advancements achieved in the field of communication, transportation and other infrastructure. Consequentially, certain individuals claim that this trend will result in the elimination of cultural norms and formations. I personally uphold the view that the establishment of one cultural nation with less diversity will be one of the infamous implications of globalization.
7.5
band
In the last few decades there have been more and more cases of famous people being hounded by the press. Some people think that famous people in the media have no right to privacy. To what extent do you agree?
Historically, renowned people have been harassed by the media. Nowadays, some techniques have been applied in artists' lives in order to avoid being hounded by an intrusive paparazzi. For this reason, many people argue that celebrities have not enjoyed their privacy. I personally agree with this statement, and in this essay, I explain the reasons.
5
band
Sugary drinks should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that drinks with a lot of sugar should be priced higher to reduce people's glucose intake. This essay agrees with this statement because of the risk of consuming a high amount of sugar and that hiking the price up would promote a better global health for all.
6.5
band
Write about the following topic: Many major cities are facing a housing crisis as they cannot provide enough land for new buildings. Some local governments believe the problem could be solved by reassigning park land for residential development, because this land would be better used for housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Urban migration is causing extreme pressure on housing and infrastructure and, consequently, some people feel that public parks have become a luxury that we can no longer afford. While it is true that green areas can take up a lot of space, the benefits to the residents of a city and to the environment are too numerous to ignore.
6.5
band
You are planning to travel and would like someone to take care of your apartment while you are away. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Explain why you will be away Ask your friend to take care of your apartment Describe the tasks you want your friend to do.
I hope this email finds you in radiant health, and you are doing well. I am writing this letter to look after my apartment during my upcoming trip to Canada.

‏In some countries, university students live far away from home and in another city or country while studying. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In the last few decades there have been more and more cases of famous people being hounded by the press. Some people think that famous people in the media have no right to privacy. To what extent do you agree?

Sugary drinks should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

You are planning to travel and would like someone to take care of your apartment while you are away. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Explain why you will be away Ask your friend to take care of your apartment Describe the tasks you want your friend to do.