‏In some countries, university students live far away from home and in another city or country while studying. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

#‏in #countries #university #students #home #city #country

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In today's world, the debate surrounding education has become a central topic of public discourse. It is evident and noteworthy that university

students

living far away from

home

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

become a common phenomenon.

While

acknowledging its merits and drawbacks, I am more inclined

towads

Correct your spelling

toward

its

Replace the word

it's

it is

show examples

being positive. In support of its upsides, my stance is primarily shaped by its logical coherence that

students

foster economic growth by living far from

home

This

stance is firmly grounded in the belief that

students

need to spend more money and are more inclined to get a part-time job. A significant study from Hong Kong University confirmed that

students

who live far away from

home

receive more financial support than

students

who live close by,

further

reinforcing

this

view. It is

also

important to consider that they would become more independent, largely by doing laundry and paying

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their bills. In

this

way, they could cultivate more skills in order to adapt to society after graduation.

Therefore

, there are numerous compelling arguments supporting

this

issue.

On the other hand

, there are an array of demerits behind the phenomenon, including the

nostagia

Correct your spelling

nostalgia

, especially for those living in other countries. The basis of

this

view depends on the fact that people experience isolation and loneliness when they are alone in an unfamiliar environment.

However

, it is crucial to recognize that

this

kind of loneliness is fixable.

For example

, by making friends or having

home

-style cuisine.

For instance

, a recent government analysis showed that Chinese

students

who study abroad in Canada reported a higher rate of happiness than

students

in England, mainly

due to

the quality of Chinese restaurants. In conclusion, after thoroughly examining both sides, my conviction in the assertion that university

students

live

Correct pronoun usage

who live

show examples

far away from

home

gain more pros than cons remains strong.

Submitted by 994620786 on Tue Jun 25 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that all your main points are sufficiently developed and supported with clear examples. While you provided general support, adding more detailed examples could enhance your argument.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to any small language inaccuracies. While they don’t significantly impact comprehension, refining these will make your essay even more polished.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear and balanced discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of living far from home, then leans towards the positive. This shows thorough consideration of the issue.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs explaining both views, and a conclusion that reaffirms your stance. This logical flow enhances readability.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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‏In some countries, university students live far away from home and in another city or country while studying. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development??

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Others, however, say that this would have little affect on public health and other measure are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interest and whether they are marries od single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Other disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?