As technology advances, travelling to space is likely to become an option for holidaymakers in the future. What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages.

Nowadays, Technology is the fastest-growing concept amongst the human population. In future,
space
scientists can create the possibility for mankind to travel to other planets for vacations.
This
essay will first suggest the enhancement of technology and opportunities for travel out of the world, and
then
demonstrate that risk to
life
and irregularities in biological activity could be the primary drawbacks of
this
concept. One of the motivations behind travelling to other planets for holidays is that people can learn and experience different things. As wide technology provides the public with unlimited access to innovations, instruments, and knowledge, which plays a crucial role in the development of human beings,
furthermore
, by experiencing
space
, we can analyze the nature and
life
possibilities on individual planets.
Likewise
, it could be a proud moment for today's generation to explore another globe.
This
is because our next generation can explore and try to find permanent human
life
expectancy on other land of the solar system.
For instance
, NASA selected 8 citizens through the competitive exam and planning to send them to 2027 the moon spaceship, which will be a great opportunity to feel the moon and
space
.
However
, the idea of administrating every detail of the operation on one own can be disadvantageous. First of all, it is difficult for biological systems to accept the new environments,
moreover
, it could be a very challenging issue for aeronautical companies and passengers. In addition,
due to
heavy machinery, it has a high possibility of technical issues, and can
also
have a high risk of
life
.
Moreover
, the price of
life
is more important than the advantage.
For example
, in 1986, NASA's
space
project had a disaster called STS-51-L: the
Space
shuttle Challenger Disaster, in that it led to the death of all astronauts on board civilian,
rocket
Add an article
the rocket
a rocket
show examples
had a technical issue in the boosters after minutes of launching and
suffered
Verb problem
apply
show examples
from many other fluctuations in the craft. In conclusion, being a participant in
such
holidays has certain merits relating to experience and knowledge. The downside of
this
concept involves risk to
life
and high capital,
therefore
, should be considered carefully.
Submitted by rohanshingala7781 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
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Coherence and Cohesion
Use transition words more effectively to improve the logical flow between ideas. Words such as 'however,' 'moreover,' and 'therefore' need to be accurately placed to show contrast or addition clearly.
Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
Elaborate more on each idea to ensure that they are fully developed. Some points are mentioned but not sufficiently explained or expanded upon.
Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction gives a clear outline of what the essay will address, setting up a clear expectation for the reader.
Introduction and Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay and provides a clear final perspective on the topic.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, showing a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

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