The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has led to many social problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is often argued that social
problems
have increased by using mobile phones
over the past several years.I strongly agree with the said notion,that mobile phones
have caused social isolation and a sedentary lifestyle.This
essay will explore these problems
in detail.
On the one hand, the mobile phone has become an essential part of our lives as, most people
use mobile phones
as a source of communication, to connect with friends, family, and even people
around the world.For example
, Instagram, Facebook, and WhatsApp are widely used apps that people
utilize to make connections.In other words
, nowadays people
have limited time to make face-to-face interaction with others,and they seldom visit their relationships that's why mobile phones
are used for making video calls, or to chit-chat with friends, having no physical connections.
However
, many social problems
have been raised because of using mobile phones
such
as social isolation as well as
unhealthy lifestyles. People
have reduced kinship with others, they want to live in their own world, in addition
, they do not want anyone to interfere in their lives because of this
they have bound themselves.Thus
it leads to social isolation.secondly
, excessive use of mobile phones
has made people
lazy and inactive as a result
of this
they face numerous social and psychological problems
for instance
, people
who spend their time alone are more prone to depression in their lives.
To sum up
, mobile phones
have both pros and cons, spending a large amount of time using a mobile makes people
stressed and isolated and socially not productive.Submitted by madihaali8470 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. While you mentioned platforms like Instagram and Facebook, try to provide data or studies that support the impact of these platforms on social isolation and sedentary lifestyles.
coherence cohesion
Ensure all ideas are clearly connected; work on making each paragraph transition smoothly to the next. This will help maintain the reader's train of thought throughout the essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear, sets a strong premise, and is very relevant to the topic.
logical structure
Your essay structure is logical, with clear paragraphs and a consistent argument. This enhances readability.
clear comprehensive ideas
You effectively identified and articulated two major negative consequences of mobile phone use, providing a foundation for your argument.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!