The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The given maps illustrate a harbour in the past and the transformation of it today.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
both roads in the plans are being expanded, some facilities located in
south-west
Correct article usage
the south-west
show examples
and south-east have been built and swapped locations. In 2000, whilst the main road only led to one car park, nowadays it has been expanded and led to both of the aforementioned places. The street in the south of the map has removed the way to the car park,
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
however,
show examples
a lane
went
Correct pronoun usage
that went
show examples
through the hotel, which was built to replace the castle in 2000, has been added. The public beach in the past today has been converted into a private beach for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hotel visitors only. In the north of the Porth Harbour, the dock has been added to another one. Looking to the
south-west
Correct your spelling
southwest
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the map, a
showers
Fix the agreement mistake
shower
show examples
and toilets room has been constructed above the second car park,
while
Linking Words
the fishing boats and the marina have been swapped together.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in the south, there are cafes and shops on the left of the lifeboat.
Submitted by weezel on

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grammar
Ensure accurate use of prepositions and grammatical structures to enhance clarity.
structure
Include a more detailed description of the harbor's transformation in the introduction and conclusion for a more unified response.
vocabulary
Try to use varied vocabulary and sentence structures to make the essay more engaging.
comparison
Good attempt at comparing features of the harbor from 2000 and today.
description
Identified and described key changes in the harbor's layout and facilities effectively.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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