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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the percentage of male and female academic staff members across the faculties of a major university in 2012.

The graph below shows the percentage of male and female academic staff members across the faculties of a major university in 2012.
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The bar chart describes the gender distribution of academic staff members across seven
faculties
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 of a major university in 2012. In summary,
males
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 showed more active
presences
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presence
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 in various
faculties
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 than
females
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.
And the
Correct word choice
The
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 most marked disparity between the sexes was observed in engineering, which consisted of the largest quantities of
males
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 but the least of
females
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, in terms of medicine, the figure of both
male
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males
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 and
female
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females
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 remained the same. Commencing with business and science, these two
faculties
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similarly
Linking Words
 engaged a bigger number of
males
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 compared to their counterparts, with a difference of 30 members in each case. Meanwhile,
law
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the law
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also
Linking Words
 attracted more
males
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 than
females
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, with a deviation
about
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of about
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 20. Shifting attention to the remaining two
faculties
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, the gender proportion was converse. Education stood out with 75
females
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,
while
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 the number of
males
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 was considerably lower (around 25).
And the
Correct word choice
The
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 gender gap in arts was marginal, with 10
females
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 more than
males
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.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words faculties, males, females with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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