Some people believe that individuals who earn a lot of money are the most successful. Others say that the individuals who contribute to the society (such as scientists or teachers) are the most successful. 🔸Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 word
Some become successful
by
their Change preposition
through
money
and some by their skills. Some people say that only those people are successful who earn a lot of money
and other opposition
say that Replace the word
opponents
person
who Fix the agreement mistake
people
work
as part of Change the verb form
works
society
like, scientists, teacher
, Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
navy
Correct word choice
and navy
officer
are the most successful. I believe that both are successful Fix the agreement mistake
officers
on
their position.
Whatever you earn, would be always less. Change preposition
in
Money
can buy everything, including famination
, good Correct your spelling
family
cloths
, Correct your spelling
clothes
accomodation
, luxurious items Correct your spelling
accommodation
or
more and that's why people Correct word choice
and
has
been running to earn more and more. Because of high income, Correct subject-verb agreement
have
person
Add an article
a person
the person
get
respect from the family and Change the verb form
gets
even
invited by the Add a missing verb
is even
society
to attend the function as a chief guest which get
them faminations. Change the verb form
gets
For Instance
, Mukesh ambani
Change the capitalization
Ambani
who
is Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
a
sucessful
businessman and Correct your spelling
successful
he
has always been invited by the government to attend Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
events. Because he earning a lot, he has been called by Correct article usage
apply
federal
to attend the functions.
On Correct article usage
the federal
other
hand, some works Correct article usage
the other
are
Change the verb form
are also considered
also
consider as
successful Change preposition
apply
such
as,
Remove the comma
apply
teacher
, army Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
officer
or scientists. Teacher plays a vital role in Fix the agreement mistake
officers
the
Correct article usage
apply
society
and they are the back bone
of successful Correct your spelling
backbone
person
. Because of good education among children, Fix the agreement mistake
people
society
has been successful and their contributions are much
important as Rephrase
as
money
. Scientists who research and give something to the nation. For example
, a famous scientist named Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam who he
had not taken any Correct pronoun usage
apply
money
from state
during his entire life and had found Add an article
the state
rocket
for the country. Today his name has been Correct article usage
a rocket
recalling
by the country which Wrong verb form
recalled
is show
that he was successful because of his skill not Wrong verb form
shows
money
.
In conclusion, I would say that both group
of Change to a plural noun
groups
poople
are Correct your spelling
people
sucsessful
as one Correct your spelling
successful
person
earn
a lot of Correct subject-verb agreement
earns
money
and give
something back to Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
the
Correct article usage
apply
society
and other
Correct pronoun usage
others
also
contributing
Wrong verb form
contribute
by
their skills which foster the future generation.Change preposition
to
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the sentences flow logically. This will help in improving the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking phrases (e.g., 'however,' 'on the other hand,' 'moreover') to connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs smoothly.
task achievement
Provide more developed and specific examples to support the points made. This will add depth to your arguments and make them more convincing.
task achievement
Ensure that the response fully addresses all parts of the task prompt. Make explicit comparisons between the two views in your discussion to highlight a balanced analysis.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which anchors the main points effectively.
task achievement
The essay attempts to discuss both views, following the task prompt.
task achievement
There are some relevant examples (e.g., Mukesh Ambani, Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam) used to support the arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.