IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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Customers, who come from different places, can buy multiple meals and snacks, which are produced in other countries, in a
supermarket
Use synonyms
 in the present. It brings a pro and con for the nation's society and their economy. In my opinion,
this
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 situation is a positive development rather than a negative development. The following essay will discuss the world issue. From the qualities of life perspective, it is advantageous for the citizens, who focus on the type of
food
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. As we know some special
food
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 is yummy and tastes good but it is difficult to have if we do not visit other countries.
However
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, people can buy
food
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 easily
then
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 they can try to have it since they buy these in their local
supermarket
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.
It
Correct pronoun usage
There
show examples
 is no denying that the opponent's idea,
it
Correct word choice
that it
show examples
 impacts the travel industry, is true,
while
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 it is not the majority.
For example
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, sushi is a famous
food
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 from Japan and is sold in the
supermarket
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 everywhere.
Hence
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, it does not have a drawback that influences the travel industry.
In addition
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, poor people may not have experience and the chance to go to another place to taste international
food
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,
then
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 it provides the opportunity .
According to
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 the survey, almost 30% of Hong Kong residents are under the poverty line, which is approximately $10000 each month. They are hard to go the other places, excluding the Mainland, so they have no chance to buy
food
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.
Although
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 they have savings every year, they may save a long time and visit close places
such
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 as Asia countries.
Therefore
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, the situation in the
supermarket
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 is helpful for them today because they try different
food
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.
To conclude
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, it is beneficial for consumers to taste
food
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, which is produced all over the world. Some argue that it develops a disadvantage but visitors do not consider it if they go to travel. I think the life qualities are the most important for people.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and logically support it with coherent sentences. Use transitional phrases to link ideas more effectively and smoothly.
task achievement
Extend your main points with more specific and relevant examples to make your argument stronger and more persuasive.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position on the topic, stating that the situation is a positive development.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present, providing a clear start and end to the discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
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