Some people say that fast food restaurants have advantages other believe otherwise what is your opinion and why

this

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contemporary epoch, junk food is taking the place of standard one. I hold the view that

this

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trend has a negative impact on communities and families because many individuals have become cravers for

this

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type of

meals

Fix the agreement mistake

meal

show examples

, and

this

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puts a burden on families and affects their health. In the following paragraphs, my point of view will be

further

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discussed.

To begin

Linking Words

with, some economists believe that

this

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phenomenon has a harmful effect on individuals, and they could spend a huge amount of their budget on restaurants’ food. To illustrate, when people do not have meals at home and they prefer to eat ready-made ones, they will spend their income on

such

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dishes

Use synonyms

Accordingly

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this

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could cause a lot of problems related to their financial estates.

For example

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, a survey conducted by the New York magazine revealed that individuals nowadays consume about half of their salaries on conventional food. What can be said is that fast meals negatively affect people’s lives, and they must adjust their habits to become financially stable.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it can be witnessed that

this

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kind of behaviour has many harmful effects on health and many serious diseases can result from it.

In other words

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, if people replace their healthy homemade recipes with products that are full of fat, calories, and salt,

this

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could result in many health-related issues. A prime example of

that is

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an article published by the Health World Organization that revealed that obesity, hypertension, and diabetes are closely related to fast

dishes

Use synonyms

Thus

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this

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kind of

Use synonyms

dishes

Fix the agreement mistake

dish

show examples

not only affects people's economies but

also

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could lead to a dangerous influence on their well-being. In conclusion,

after

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this

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essay has manifested the above-mentioned point, it can be reiterated that fast

dishes

Use synonyms

have a tremendous impact on people’s lives in many aspects. I am convinced that it is the reason behind many issues and it must be changed with beneficial nutrients.

Fatimah

Jun 28, 2024

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introduction

The essay would benefit from a clearer thesis statement that explicitly outlines the main arguments. While the introduction is engaging, it can be refined for more precision. Consider stating clearly that the essay will discuss financial and health impacts.

coherence

Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that all ideas within the paragraph are aligned to support this topic. The paragraphs are largely cohesive but could be improved by more explicit linking sentences and phrases that guide the reader through your argument.

task response

The essay discusses relevant points but can be further strengthened with more specific data or examples. The financial burden and health impacts are well noted, yet incorporating additional studies or statistics could bolster the argument in favor of your opinion.

introduction

The introduction effectively sets the stage for the essay and the conclusion nicely ties all the points together, reinforcing the argument against fast food.

logical structure

The ideas are well-organized and flow logically from one to the next, ensuring the reader can easily follow your argument.

language usage

The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary, which enhances readability and engagement. Good use of examples and references to authoritative sources provides a solid backing for your arguments.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

319 words

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