Some Universities in less developed countries hire professors from well-known universities to improve the quality of education. Some believe that this is not a perfect solution and there are other ways to enhance the quality of education. Do you agree or disagree?
Hiring first-class
professors
from first-class universities
is viewed as an ineffective way for some people to improve the quality
of education
in educational institution
in less-developed Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
countries
. Personally, I disagree with this
statement and consider the path of recruiting professors
from well-known academy
as one of the best solutions to improve the Fix the agreement mistake
academies
quality
of education
in developing state
to some extent which will be explained in Fix the agreement mistake
states
this
essay.
On the one hand, it is believed that hiring professors
from prestigious universities
could burden the universities
in less-developed countries
in terms of budget. It could increase the cost of paying the professors
who contribute to education
improving
, providing that most Replace the word
improvement
universities
in developing countries
do not have good stability in financial. Although
it is seen as a high-risk approach, especially in cost, it would not be a big problem if the universities
committed to allocating their budget mostly to education
quality
improvement.
On the other hand
, professors
from world-class universities
are considered representative of the high quality
of education
. By having a lot of experience in good learning methods, curriculum
, or educational systems, they could be a good role model and apply Fix the agreement mistake
curricula
this
good value in less-developed ways to overcome their problems. Their capabilities are not only in the classroom but in infrastructure such
as embracing the advance of technology, mirroring the well-known universities
which have applied this
approach before. Therefore
, by adopting the system of discipline from high-class universities
, developing region
could ensure that their Fix the agreement mistake
regions
quality
of study would be sustainable and grow.
To sum up
, it seems to me that hiring professors
from one ofAdd an article
the
universities
is an effective way to alleviate the quality
of schooling in many universities
in developing countries
for long-term success as long as they can mitigate the financial problems which could appear forward
.Rephrase
apply
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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets the premise well. However, try to avoid repetition and redundancy to make it even crisper. For example, the phrase 'to improve the quality of education in developing state to some extent which will be explained in this essay' is somewhat repetitive.
task achievement
Within the paragraphs, while you did provide some supporting points, using specific examples or data could enhance the effectiveness of your argument. For instance, citing a case where a university in a developing country improved due to hiring international professors would be beneficial.
coherence cohesion
The coherence and cohesion of your essay are generally good. However, ensure the seamless flow of ideas by using better transitional phrases between your arguments. Avoid abrupt shifts in thoughts.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences are a bit lengthy and complex. Breaking them down into smaller sentences can improve readability and make your points clearer. For instance, 'Although it is seen as a high-risk approach, especially in cost, it would not be a big problem if the universities committed to allocating their budget mostly to education quality improvement.' can be simplified.
task achievement
Finally, work on syntactical variety. Add more sophisticated sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are strong and provide a clear stance on the issue.
supported main points
Your essay addresses both perspectives, showing a balanced understanding of the topic.
logical structure
You provide good reasoning and logic to support your viewpoint, especially in the second paragraph about the costs and benefits.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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