In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development

In many nations around the world, locals from rural

areas

are moving to urban

areas

therefore

, the number of inhabitants in the countryside is going down. From my point of view, I partly agree with

this

statement for some reasons mentioned in

this

essay. On the one hand, there are some good aspects when rural

people

settle down in

centre

Add an article

the centre

show examples

Firstly

, more job opportunities are offered. Cities often have many factories and firms,

therefore

, sources of income will be provided for rural inhabitants.

Secondly

, many

people

move to cities to experience plenty of better health, education or entertainment services which don't grow well in the countryside.

Moreover

, living in a city helps them develop themselves better, it

also

brings many chances to learn and expand relationships.

Additionally

, when residents from many regions settle down in urban

areas

together, cultural diversity will be promoted which creates a diverse living environment.

On the other hand

, there are some drawbacks.

Firstly

, migrations can lead to a population fall in rural

areas

and local cultures will gradually disappear.

Furthermore

, when

people

move

Change preposition

apply

show examples

downtown too much, cities will face infrastructure overload, and traffic jams

due to

the growth in residents. Another serious issue is that overpopulation will lead to environmental problems and the lack of green spaces.

Lastly

, because of the population rise, crime rates will

also

go up and other social problems

such

as homelessness and violence will appear. In conclusion, moving to

cites

Correct your spelling

cities

show examples

has both good and bad aspects. Many

people

want to settle down in the city to develop themselves and their careers,

while

others want to live in the countryside,

as a consequence

this

depends on each individual.

Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on Sat Jun 29 2024

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coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, ensure to use more linking phrases and transitional words throughout your paragraphs.

task achievement

Try to further develop your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your arguments.

coherence cohesion

You provided a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

Your essay addresses both the positive and negative aspects of the topic effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

278 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that Ebooks and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspaper and magazines.tp what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people believe that individuals who earn a lot of money are the most successful. Others say that the individuals who contribute to the society (such as scientists or teachers) are the most successful. 🔸Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 word

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people believe that art, such as painting and music, does not improve people’s lives, so the government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.