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Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions #features #comparisons
The graph provides information about the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of living people in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
,
Malaysia
,
Thailand
, and
Indonesia
 from 1970 to 2020 followed by the forecast
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 2030 and 2040. It can be seen that from 1970 to 2020, the society's percentage fluctuated in
Phillipines
Correct your spelling
Philippines
 and
Thailand
,
while
Malaysia
 and
Indonesia
were increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 moderately.
Furthermore
, the projection
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 2030 to 2040 increased gradually for all countries. From 1970 to 1990, the percentage of the population in
Phillipines
Correct article usage
the Phillipines
show examples
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
almost 50%, and had a downfall to 40% in 2020.
Furthermore
, the number of living people in
Thailand
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
stabilized by 25% from 1990 to 2020.
Moreover
,
Malaysia
 and
Indonesia
 gained 70% of population in 2020.
In addition
, the prophecy for the living society in 2030 and 2024 for four countries have
rised
Correct your spelling
raised
risen
 slowly by 25% to 35% in
Thailand
, 45% to 50% in
Correct article usage
the Phillipines
show examples
Phillipines
Correct your spelling
Philippines
, 57% to 60% in
Indonesia
, and 80% to 82% in
Malaysia
.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words malaysia, thailand, indonesia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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