In today's globalized world, some people believe international travel is essential for personal growth. Others argue it's a luxury that has a negative impact on the environment. Discuss both these views. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the modern developed world, some individuals consider international
travel
as a crucial way for personal improvement. While
some people think that it is nothing but costliness that has a deleterious effect on the environment
, I would agree that international travel
has a profound impact on personal growth.
Firstly
, many may agree that international travel
is just a waste of money, and it has drawbacks for the environment
. This
is because transportation vehicles that are used in international travel
have an accumulation of gases, which is dangerous for the environment
. To combat this
issue, I would recommend repairs of vehicles, and changing to more eco-friendly products and machines. For instance
, An international plane must be aware of its responsibilities to the environment
, and utilize a system that hinders adverse gas release.
Secondly
, international travel
has numerous positive outcomes. It has contributed to overall
personal improvement. Through traveling we gain several life experiences and face new unique cultures. Thus
, it fosters individuals to embrace new cultures and enhances a person's life knowledge. For example
, when I travel
to Greece I look over many ancient sculptures and constructions that elevate my cultural comprehension.
In conclusion, Although
some may deliberate over the negative impact of international traveling
on the Change the spelling
travelling
environment
, I highly recommend the repair and replacement of travel
vehicles with eco-friendly ones. There are several benefits of international travel
for personal growth, such
as enhanced cultural knowledge and more life experience. Ultimately, individuals access a higher level of cultural awareness through international travel
.Submitted by Yasar Khan on
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task response
Your essay presents a well-rounded discussion of both sides of the argument. To strengthen your Task Response, ensure that each point is elaborated on with more depth. For example, for the environmental impact, you could discuss specific data or studies to support your claims.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, make sure your transitions between ideas and paragraphs are as smooth as possible. While the essay is largely cohesive, linking words and phrases like 'However,' 'Moreover,' and 'On the other hand' can further enhance the flow of your arguments.
task response
Consider including more concrete and varied examples to support your points. Real-world statistics, studies, or well-known incidents can make your arguments more persuasive and your essay more compelling.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, providing a clear viewpoint and summarizing the arguments well.
relevant specific examples
Examples such as your personal experience in Greece effectively illustrate your points and make the essay more relatable.
supported main points
Your main points are logical and effectively supported, with a good balance between discussing the negative and positive aspects of international travel.
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