Large companies use sport events to promote their products. Some people think this has a negative impact on sports. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Major many youngsters try to taste and drink them.
companies
often sponsor Use synonyms
sports
events to advertise their goods. Many people think that Use synonyms
this
advertising has a bad impact on Linking Words
sports
. I partially disagree Use synonyms
it
that large Correct pronoun usage
apply
companies
use Use synonyms
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
compitition
to develop their Correct your spelling
competition
products
Use synonyms
that
Correct word choice
apply
this
has Linking Words
positive
effect Add an article
a positive
to
Change preposition
on
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
Linking Words
also
has some negative impact on Correct word choice
but also
sports
.
Large Use synonyms
companies
advertise their product in Use synonyms
Use synonyms
sport
tournaments that Change the noun form
sports
has
benefits on Correct subject-verb agreement
have
sport
. Big Use synonyms
companies
help Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
apply
Use synonyms
sport
to develop by prompting. If big Fix the agreement mistake
sports
companies
sponsor Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
apply
Use synonyms
sport
, Fix the agreement mistake
sports
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these sports
sport
will develop. Use synonyms
Linking Words
Also
all expenses and Add a comma
Also,
Correct article usage
the sportman's
sportman's
salary Correct your spelling
sportsman's
pay
on time. Wrong verb form
are paid
For example
, in European Linking Words
countries
football Add a comma
countries,
very
developed nowadays because big Add a missing verb
is very
companies
advertise their Use synonyms
products
by using famous football Use synonyms
players
and football matches. Use synonyms
Players
use their Use synonyms
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
such
as drink Linking Words
coco cola
, eat lays and use Correct your spelling
Coca-Cola
ipone
and Correct your spelling
iPhone
sumsung
Correct your spelling
Samsung
brends
. After Correct your spelling
brands
that
Add a comma
that,
Linking Words
this
goods are bought faster than others. Developed Change the determiner
these
companies
can give big Use synonyms
salary
for promoting and Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these sports
sport
types will develop.
Use synonyms
Nevertheless
, promotions have some negative effects on a match because they can distract the people or Linking Words
players
from Use synonyms
keeping
attention to the game they play or watch. Verb problem
paying
Moreover
, promoting Linking Words
of
unhealthy goods bad effect Change preposition
apply
to
everyone. Change preposition
on
For example
, Linking Words
players
Use synonyms
all
Change preposition
of all
Use synonyms
sport
types drink energy drinks Fix the agreement mistake
sports
such
as flash, adrenaline, Linking Words
gorilla
. Correct word choice
and gorilla
Linking Words
This
drinks have Change the determiner
These
much
bad sides for human Change the quantifier
many
healthy
. After advertising Replace the word
health
of
famous Change preposition
apply
sportsman
Fix the agreement mistake
sportsmen
Add a comma
,
Linking Words
This
Change the determiner
This product
These products
products
can negative impact on Use synonyms
sports
.
In conclusion, on the Use synonyms
overall
trend , I partially disagree Linking Words
it
. Change preposition
with it
Altough
the many unnecessary Correct your spelling
Although
products
are promoted by Use synonyms
sports
events Use synonyms
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
also
have Linking Words
much
benefits Change the quantifier
many
the
Change preposition
to the
sport
financially.Use synonyms
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task achievement
Your essay provides a general response to the task and covers both positive and negative impacts, which is good. However, the essay can be further improved by clearly stating your position on the issue in the introduction and maintaining a consistent argument throughout the essay.
task achievement
Try to avoid repetitive phrases like 'promoting' and instead use varied vocabulary to enhance the readability and sophistication of your language. Moreover, avoid spelling errors such as 'compitition' (competition) and 'brends' (brands).
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your arguments. Make sure each paragraph clearly supports one main idea, and use transition words to make the connection between ideas smoother.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction sets a clear context and your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points. This will improve the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Your essay includes relevant specific examples, which enrich your arguments. The mention of European football and energy drinks are good illustrative points.
task achievement
There is an attempt to present both sides of the argument, showcasing a balanced approach to the discussion. This is commendable and reflects critical thinking.