IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 9

You will move to a new city for work. You know some people who live there. Write a letter to someone you know who lives there. In your letter - ask them for help in finding accommodation - tell them where you would like to live - tell them the type of place you are looking for. You should write at least 150 words.

#move #city #work #people #someone #lives #accommodation #type #place
Dear Nadine, It's been a
while
 since our
last
 conversation. How are you doing? I have some good news: in the near future, my family and I will be moving to the city where you live, and we could meet more frequently. I would like to ask for your help with the move. Getting advice about the best places to live with a family would be significant. The accommodation we are looking for should have three bedrooms and be pet-friendly. I enjoy spacious and bright homes with a large kitchen.
Additionally
, I have always dreamed of having a large balcony or yard to plant a variety of beautiful flowers. On the one hand, it would be wonderful if it was in a quiet district, close to public transport.
On the other hand
, despite accessible transport, a private parking lot is a must-have for us.
Moreover
, the education system in the area plays an essential role in choosing a place to live since we have a child. I know your advice is always helpful;
therefore
, I hope
this
 time, relying on your opinion, we will find a gorgeous place for our family. Cheers, Valerie
Submitted by valerie.kabishcher on

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task achievement
You've effectively addressed all aspects of the task. However, you could enhance your response by mentioning a specific area or neighborhood you prefer, which would make your needs more explicit.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all sentences are complete and avoid minor grammatical slips. This would help to maintain the overall high quality of your letter.
coherence cohesion
Your letter has a logical structure, making it easy to follow your request and the specifics of your needs.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately friendly and polite, fitting the context of writing to a friend.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph conveys a single, clear idea, contributing to the overall coherence of your letter.
task achievement
You have fully addressed the task, providing all necessary details about your accommodation preferences.
task achievement
The tone of your letter is appropriate and warm, making the request polite and considerate.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • relocating, accommodation, housing
  • assistance, recommendations, suburbs
  • neighborhood, proximity, amenities, vibrant
  • studio, apartment, shared house, unfurnished
  • budget, preferences, survey, listings
  • grateful, anticipate, guidance, invaluable
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