The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?
These
days
, the number of working days
should be less in a week, with longer days
off at the weekend. I firmly agree with this
opinion and shed light on possible future outcomes in this
essay.
There are two advantages of having a short time
to work
during the week. First and foremost, these days
, technological advancements are forming new systems and timing to work
. Technical improvements force robots to spread to different fields, leading to a decrease in the demand for the workforce, meaning that we no longer should work
on our own during the day. Instead
, the dedication of time
to inventing discoveries and being innovative is a more crucial feature of everyday life.
Therefore
, learning how to make the work
easier is more significant than working an
excessive amount of Change preposition
for an
time
.
Secondly
, working less
hours is a good way of taking care of family members, which leads to a balanced lifestyle and a managed daily routine that makes us active mentally and physicallyChange the quantifier
fewer
alike
. Since, the rising proportion of weekly workload often leads to serious health-related issues Correct word choice
apply
such
as stress, carelessness at work
, inefficacy of work
, physical damage, and trembling, followed by possible death Thus
, having more days
off at the weekends builds strong relationships and quick connections with family and relatives, providing a happy life.
On the other hand
, working more in some jobs is essential due to
monetary benefits and extra income for the family budget. There are some jobs that require workers to work
more, such
as factory employees, salespeople, and servants. The amount of these jobs
salary depends on the volume of Change noun form
jobs'
work
, meaning that working extra days
even at weekends helps to reduce financial difficulties. Additionally
, having more work
leads to increased physical activity during work
, causing to lose health-related issues such
as,
obesity, weak musculature, and high blood pressure. Remove the comma
apply
Therefore
, working more time
may come at the expense of a higher salary.
To conclude
, although
working more hours can rise
the salary and offer a healthy body, having more Correct your spelling
raise
days
off is responsible for good relationships and innovative inventions.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task achievement
Try to enhance clarity and make sure that every point you make is easily understandable to the reader. Supporting your statements with relevant statistics or studies could strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow between paragraphs. Ensure that your transition from one point to the next is seamless and that there is a clear connection between your main points. You could use more transitional phrases to improve the flow.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea. Ensure that your supporting sentences directly relate to the paragraph's main point. Avoid making points that can seem tangential or unrelated.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic. You firmly agree with the idea of a shorter working week and provide several supporting arguments for your stance.
coherence cohesion
You have a structured approach to your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This organization helps the reader follow your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.