Some people believe that secondary school children should study international news as a subject. Others say that this is wasting time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #school #children #study #news #time

this

modern day and age, the

world

is constantly changing and updating. As

such

, some believe that

students

between the ages of 11 to 18 should be made to study global

news

. Not everyone is on the same page,

however

; opponents say

this

is merely wasting their children's time.

This

essay shall explore both sides of the argument and stand for the former. On one hand, it is undeniably important to know what is going on in the

world

, even for

students

. By studying international events, they learn about the outside

world

's developments and problems alike.

This

not only enriches their knowledge

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

builds a sense of empathy and care by providing pupils with an extra point of view. Let's take the current Israel and Gaza conflict as an example. Amidst all the bloodshed,

students

would be exposed to both sides' points of view and realize that civilians are the ones who suffer the most.

On the other hand

, normal academic subjects are

also

vital to children's development. Math, Literature, Science, etc...

such

subjects serve as foundational knowledge which pupils could build upon when pursuing higher education or actual jobs.

Due to

this

, a lot of

students

' hands are already full.

Thus

, their parents want them to put their undivided attention on their academics

instead

of studying extra things like international

news

. As seen by the evidence stated above, both sides have many valid points for contention.

Students

still need to learn about the outside

world

, but it is

also

important to keep their well-being in check.

Therefore

, I propose that international

news

be made into an extracurricular subject with a flexible schedule.

This

means

students

could easily fit the subject into their timetables, eliminating the previously stated concern.

Overall

, international

news

is undoubtedly one of the things secondary school

students

need to learn. Yet, some people want their children to fully focus on school subjects

instead

of wasting time on what they think are "extra things". To

this

end, principals and teachers shall take into their own hands the matter of implementing

such

subject

Fix the agreement mistake

subjects

show examples

into the curriculum without adding too much burden to pupils.

Mon Jul 01 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

clear comprehensive ideas

Try to develop the ideas in each paragraph a bit more to provide a clearer and more comprehensive discussion of the topic.

relevant specific examples

Consider addressing potential counterarguments more thoroughly to show a deeper understanding of the topic and to strengthen your position.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and help frame the essay effectively.

complete response

The essay addresses both views with relevant examples, making a complete response to the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

357 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

broaden horizons
cultures
global issues
critical thinking
engaged citizens
activism
interconnected
curriculum
workloads
bias
core subjects
career prospects
informed
global citizens

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Are higher taxes or lower taxes better for society? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Due to the economy in countries with a capitalistic system, people use to pay taxes that increase every year. Some of this are unfair for non wealthy-places dwellers, while the other ones foster thrive in nations. In this essay I will depicture from my own experience why higher taxes are not better for all society although some well-developed civilizations ought pay taxes according to their high incomes.
5
band
Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workspace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?
It is still a subject of debate in the society whether univerities should give learnings that will be beneficial for workspace or let the students freely learn materials only for the sake of understanding. This essay will take a side in a freedom of learning along side with my opinions and related illustrations.
4
band
1.An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies of shopping online?
Shopping online played an important part in morden life. We all see that, more and more people prefer shopping online than shopping at store. The reason is its convenient for people who do not have a lot of time to get to the store or hate crowded. They just sit at home and search for products what they need with simple steps. Another advantage is that you can read describe or review of other customer before you make a decision buy something. You can have a lot of benefits when you buy online because selller sometimes will have some discount and voucher with the cheaper price at store so you can save lots of money. Deliver service to your home and sometimes you do not need to pay for this service. Seller also has benefits such as they can sell their products to all people around the world, they do not need to pay money for hire a place or investment. They also can sell at flexible time. However, there are some disavantages with consumer. It casuse people buy many unnescessary things...
4.5
band
Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give opinions.
Nowadays, schools lessons are so significant for all pupils. Therefore, people argue about the ingreditens of lessons. While, some individiuals say history is one of the most important school subjects, others think in today's world, subjects science and technology are more important than history. Both views have upsides and downsides, in my opinion, history is the most significant lesson for all ages children. This essay will explain those below.
7.5
band
The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend
Here is the corrected version of your text:

Some people believe that secondary school children should study international news as a subject. Others say that this is wasting time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Are higher taxes or lower taxes better for society? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

1.An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies of shopping online?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give opinions.

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend