IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some claim that studying abroad has great benefits for a student’s home country. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)

#student’s #home #country
In the modern world, it has been a controversial topic that some citizens have thought that studying in domestic
universities
 provides the most knowledge and advantages for children in order to improve their countries,
while
 others suggest
otherwise
. After thorough consideration, I strongly believe that studying in overseas schools offers many benefits as well. My opinion will be thoroughly examined in the following essay. some domestic schools offer new knowledge, advanced equipment, and modern technologies enough for
students
 who commit to studying several majors and obtain supporting funding from the government and looking after personal education from their parents.
However
, some
universities
 may have insufficient,
such
 as scientific tools, tertiary rooms, and Al systems for education.
Therefore
, the government is aware of
this
 issue and wants to advocate for some citizens in order to study new things at overseas
universities
.
This
 is because it is able to improve population and economic systems better than in the past periods. It is undeniable that overseas
universities
 offer a new chance and an excellent experience for exchange
students
 and other external
students
. Those
universities
 offer several interesting majors or rare courses, including specialists.
For example
, Europe’s
universities
 have more subjects that are attractive to external
students
, especially oncology, which studies the classification of specific cancers through DNA analysis.
Furthermore
, Europe’s countries not only have genius people,
such
 as teachers, professors, and scientists but
also
 have advanced technologies for
students
 to develop their countries better. To recapitulate, even though some people may debate in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of studying in domestic schools provides several advantages.
Nevertheless
, I confidently believe that studying abroad is significant for people
due to
 the contemporary knowledge and modern technologies.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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task achievement
In the introduction, ensure the main points that will be discussed are clearly outlined to set a clear direction for the essay.
task achievement
Work on developing each main point more thoroughly. For instance, the comparison between domestic and overseas universities could be expanded with more detailed examples and evidence.
coherence cohesion
Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to improve coherence and guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitious phrases and ensure each sentence adds new information or perspective to your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay begins with a clear introduction that states the writer's opinion on the subject, which sets the stage for the analysis.
relevant specific examples
Relevant and specific examples, such as the mention of European universities and oncology, strengthen the argument by providing concrete illustrations.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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