It is controversial whether longer sentences can reduce the crime rate.What is your opinion about this issue?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent years,
crime
Use synonyms
rates have risen, and the severity of cases reported in the news has been alarming. To address
this
Linking Words
issue, some argue for stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
as longer prison
sentences
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I disagree with
this
Linking Words
approach. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will discuss several reasons why heavier
punishments
Use synonyms
may not effectively reduce
crime
Use synonyms
. Supporters of stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
argue that strengthening the law can act as a powerful deterrent, discouraging people from committing crimes out of fear of severe consequences.Longer prison
sentences
Use synonyms
, they claim , not only reduce the chances of offenders harming others but
also
Linking Words
give criminals time to reflect on their actions and potentially rehabilitate.
Additionally
Linking Words
, proponents suggest that harsh penalties send a clear message to the public, encouraging individuals to think twice before breaking the law, as the cost of committing a
crime
Use synonyms
becomes too high to justify.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, research suggests that longer prison
sentences
Use synonyms
and harsher
punishments
Use synonyms
are not effective in preventing
crime
Use synonyms
or ensuring public safety. Many offenders act impulsively or commit crimes without considering the consequences, meaning the fear of punishment often has little impact on their behaviour.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, studies indicate that some criminals may have a limited ability to plan for the future, prioritizing immediate gains over long-term consequences.
As a result
Linking Words
, stricter laws may fail to defer these individuals and
instead
Linking Words
lead to overcrowded prisons, placing an unnecessary burden on the justice system without addressing the root causes of criminal behaviour. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
stricter laws and longer
sentences
Use synonyms
may discourage law-abiding individuals from committing crimes, they are unlikely to deter habitual offenders or those who act impulsively.
Instead
Linking Words
, governments should focus on addressing the underlying causes of
crime
Use synonyms
through prevention and rehabilitation programs.
Submitted by chawanat.pla on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider incorporating more specific examples to illustrate your points. Including case studies, statistical data, or specific instances where longer sentences have or haven't worked could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that every paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While the essay is generally coherent, enhancing the connections between points can provide better flow and make your argument even more compelling.
task achievement
The essay provides a comprehensive response to the task, covering multiple perspectives on the issue of longer sentences and crime rates. It clearly addresses the question and offers well-developed reasons for the stance taken.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are effectively structured, with a clear thesis statement in the introduction and a strong summarization of points in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported with explanations and discussions, showing a good understanding of the topic and the related arguments about crime and punishment.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Deterrent effect
  • Recidivism
  • Incarceration
  • Reintegration
  • Overcrowding
  • Financial strain
  • Inhumane conditions
  • Root causes
  • Community service
  • Probation
  • Therapy programs
  • Calculated decision-making
  • Desperation
  • Rehabilitation programs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: