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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

These days, many parents choose to send their children to study abroad. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad.

#parents #children #study
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Studying abroad is at the peak of popularity, and everyone wants to study in another country, but do they know the advantages and disadvantages of foreign education? If we talk about advantages, there are a lot of them.
For example
Linking Words
, it gives you experience and knowledge about the culture of another country.
Also
Linking Words
, you can
increase
Verb problem
improve
show examples
 your English and get
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 education because in another country they can have
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 education level.
In addition
Linking Words
, you can learn how to take responsibility for your life.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 it has disadvantages that can bring a lot of problems. First is the language barrier. If you have bad English speaking abilities or don't know it well, you won't understand a lot of things and you will not be able to express yourself.
Second,
Linking Words
many people have to work because
without
Add the comma(s)
, without
show examples
 money, you will not have enough cash even for basic needs. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 if you want to study abroad it's ok, but you have to be ready to study there.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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task response
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines what the essay will discuss. You have mentioned that you will discuss advantages and disadvantages, but it could be more explicitly stated.
task response
Expand on your arguments with more specific details and examples to strengthen your points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to integrate linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will improve the flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which is important for organizing your thoughts.
task response
It addresses both advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad, fulfilling the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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