IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

(2016) It is not necessary for people to travel abroad to learn about other countries. We can learn it from bokks, films and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Most
pepole
Correct your spelling
people
 have
passion
Add an article
a passion
the passion
show examples
to learn
Change preposition
for learning
show examples
 more data about
countries
Use synonyms
 exactly current day that
socialmedia
Correct your spelling
social media
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
 more
buteaful
Correct your spelling
useful
 views about it. Some of them
brefer
Correct your spelling
prefer
 learn about it
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 and
films
Use synonyms
 but others
no
Verb problem
don't
show examples
. I
am strongly agree
Change the verb form
strongly agree
show examples
 with
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
wolud
Correct your spelling
would
 like
travel
Use synonyms
 to learn more about other
countries
Use synonyms
 than
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 about
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 by only
watch
Wrong verb form
watching
show examples
films
Use synonyms
 and images or
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
informations abot
Correct your spelling
information about
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. One reason is that the
seening
Correct your spelling
seeing
 and touching tourist attractions of
countries
Use synonyms
 will be more
intersting
Correct your spelling
interesting
 than only
watch
Replace the word
watching
show examples
.
The
Correct your spelling
They
show examples
 communicate with
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
 people either open to other social education and learn their language that
moreover
Linking Words
 will be
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
tour
Add an article
a tour
the tour
show examples
 to
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
 mood from
brusser
Correct your spelling
bruiser
 of working and
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
 and family will be
intereist
Correct your spelling
interested
 to
travel
Use synonyms
new
Add an article
the new
show examples
 country and learn new
culuter
Correct your spelling
culture
cultures
. Each year of summer major of families
spend
Change the verb form
spends
show examples
thouseds
Correct your spelling
thousands
 dollars to
travel
Use synonyms
Change preposition
to other
show examples
other place
Change the wording
another place
other places
show examples
 as
entrtinment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
entrainment
 and
educated
Wrong verb form
educate
show examples
 news
idea
Fix the agreement mistake
ideas
show examples
 about other nationality
instead
Linking Words
 stay at home and watch
televison
Correct your spelling
television
.
For example
Linking Words
,
laste
Correct your spelling
last
 year Oman
rigist
Correct your spelling
register
 one million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
travel
Use synonyms
 outside for
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
, working and
torism
Correct your spelling
tourism
terrorism
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
socialmedia
Correct your spelling
social media
 could be
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
 reason to
travel
Use synonyms
other
Change preposition
to other
show examples
countiers
Correct your spelling
countries
counties
. Nowadays, there are
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
 who would like to be famous
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
socialmedia
Correct your spelling
social media
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one method is
Use synonyms
travel
Fix the infinitive
to travel
show examples
 to other nationality and make attracive content about
area
Add an article
the area
an area
show examples
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
show
Change the form of the verb
shows
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as traditional education,
modren
Correct your spelling
modern
 hotels and tourist attraction that either will
increased
Change the verb form
increase
show examples
 your
knowleadg
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 about other
placed
Replace the word
places
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it would be
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
job
Add an article
a job
show examples
 which
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
show examples
 office
requair
Correct your spelling
requires
 to
travel
Use synonyms
 and show their
sechduol
Correct your spelling
school
 of
journy
Correct your spelling
journey
 to attract
follower
Fix the agreement mistake
followers
show examples
 to
travel
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, finince is
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 significant role for
travel
Use synonyms
 that will spend most of
salaries
Correct pronoun usage
their salaries
show examples
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
travling
Correct your spelling
travelling
 and difficult to available what life needs
for example
Linking Words
home
Correct article usage
a home
show examples
,
families
Fix the agreement mistake
family
show examples
, transport and
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
 so it might to learn about other
countries
Use synonyms
 by only
search
Wrong verb form
searching
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Use synonyms
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 and watch
films
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, I believe that
travel
Use synonyms
 is better
to learn
Change preposition
for learning
show examples
 new
principle
Fix the agreement mistake
principles
show examples
 about other
cuntries
Correct your spelling
countries
 as tour to
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
 mood and make content to
atrract moer fllowers
Correct your spelling
attract more followers
 than
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
 at home and
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 it from
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 and
films
Use synonyms
.

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grammar
Work on reducing grammatical errors for better clarity. Consider revising sentences for smoother reading.
cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Consider using linking phrases and conjunctions to improve flow.
evidence
Expand on examples and explanations to provide thorough support for your main points. Try to use a variety of examples from different contexts.
task response
You clearly state your stance on the topic, which helps in understanding your position.
task response
Your essay demonstrates a willingness to analyze both sides of the argument.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Remote exploration
  • Cultural appreciation
  • Virtual experiences
  • Firsthand interaction
  • Global awareness
  • Cultural exchange
  • Travel versus media consumption
  • Nuanced understanding
  • Cultural nuances
  • Cost-effective learning
  • Authentic experience
  • Second-hand knowledge
  • Tangible experience
  • Experiential learning
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