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Band 5.5

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. good quality of life. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

#rise #world #population #humanity #time #quality #life
The foremost problem humanity is facing is the increase in the world’s
population
.
This
 can lead to various issues
such
 as the scarcity of food and natural
resources
,
furthermore
, the shortage of minerals and reserves all around the globe can
also
 become a major concern.
To begin
 with, the current issue of a growing
population
 will lead to a lack of natural
resources
such
 as clean water, which is the most crucial necessity for the survival of a human being. The consumption of natural
resources
 all around the globe will keep on doubling if the
population
 keeps on exceeding year by year. Certain measures can be taken to prevent
this
 from happening,
such
 as spreading awareness to the people about the current issues in a way they can interpret the seriousness of
this
 concern. The main cause of
this
 continued rise is the people around the world itself.
Although the
Correct word choice
The
show examples
 government can
also
 be blamed for the same, as it’s an entity that has the authority to implement laws which can help to bring down the
overall
 numbers.
To conclude
, I do agree that the rising
population
 is a major concern humanity is facing, as the issue of shortage in natural
resources
 can lead to a full-fledged war and many new problems can arise if preventive measures are not adopted.
Submitted by patelvaibhav1463 on

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task achievement
Consider using specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments. Instead of generalizing, provide particular instances where population increase has led to problems or measures taken to control it.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving logical flow within paragraphs. Ensure each sentence follows the previous one logically and leads to the next smoothly, reinforcing the central point of the paragraph.
introduction conclusion present
Clear introduction and conclusion with a stated position regarding the issue. The importance of the topic is effectively conveyed.
complete response
The essay addresses both parts of the question, discussing the causes of population rise and expressing an opinion on the severity of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mortality rates
  • agricultural technology
  • contraception
  • family planning
  • cultural factors
  • economic incentives
  • resource strain
  • environmental degradation
  • climate change
  • habitat destruction
  • biodiversity loss
  • urban overcrowding
  • pollution
  • infrastructure challenges
  • social issues
  • unemployment
  • poverty
  • healthcare
  • education services
  • international conflicts
  • economic inequality
  • political instability
  • sustainable development
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