The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
The graph illustrates the population rates in four Asian cities between 1970 to 2020,
coupled with
estimations for 2030 and 2040.
Overall
, it is evident that
while
all countries showed an upward trend,
Malaysia
and Indonesia had the most abrupt changes. In terms of
Malaysia
and the Philippines, they both started at 30% in 1970 and showed a similar growth trend until 1990, when they reached a percentage of roughly 50. From 1970 onwards, the figure for
Malaysia
kept surging, reaching an unreached rate of 70% in 2020. Meanwhile, that of the Philippines dropped significantly to well above 40% in the same year. It is estimated that whilst the number of city dwellers in
Malaysia
goes on rising until the next 20 years, that of
Phillippines
Correct article usage
the Phillippines
show examples
will
also
recover, witnessing an increment to almost 50% in 2040. Regarding Indonesia, less than a tenth of its people resided in cities in the first year.
However
, the figure boomed to well above 50% in 2020. Thailand, having an initial 20% of the population living in urban areas,
also
had an increment, albeit less severe, to approximately 30% in 2020. By 2040, it is believed that Indonesia and Thailand will reach a rate of 60% and around 50% respectively.
Submitted by bita.rezaei7052 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Vocabulary: Replace the words malaysia with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • graph
  • percentage
  • population
  • Asian countries
  • living in cities
  • 1970
  • 2020
  • predictions
  • 2030
  • 2040
  • introduction
  • overview
  • trend
  • body paragraph
  • compare
  • predicted percentages
  • summarize
  • closing statement
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