In most of the developing and under-developed countries, well-educated professionals prefer to leave their nations after completing their studies and do jobs in developed countries. What are the reasons behind this problem? Suggest some solutions too.

Nowadays, an increasing number of professionals decide to leave their home
countries
after university, in order to find adequate
jobs
Change the noun form
job
show examples
opportunities and have higher salaries. There are many reasons behind
this
migratory phenomenon. Developed
countries
often provide much more
jobs
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job
show examples
opportunities compared to under-developed
countries
.
Moreover
, moving to another reality is seen as
chance
Add an article
a chance
show examples
to have a stable work.
Furthermore
, some
countries
provide superior equipment for certain
jobs
:
many
Correct word choice
and many
show examples
doctors or dentists leave their home
countries
because foreign hospitals and clinics have newer
gears
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gear
show examples
to support their work in a better way.
In addition
, salaries in high-developed
countries
are
ofter
Correct your spelling
often
show examples
higher. Another reason that leads professionals is a better living standard. In order to reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
migration, governments and politicians of under-developed
countries
should invest more money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
education and facilities. They should be able to pay professionals more and provide them
the
Add the preposition
with the
show examples
right stuff to complete their
jobs
.
Moreover
, governments should improve living
standars
Correct your spelling
standards
, lowering crime rates and better social services.
Submitted by chi63hi on

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coherence cohesion
Enhance the variety of sentence structures to make the writing more engaging.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support the points made.
task achievement
Try to reduce grammatical errors and improve language use. For instance, "higher-developed" should be "highly developed", and "standars" should be "standards".
task achievement
Clear explanation of reasons behind the migration and suggested solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay logically develops from the introduction to the solutions.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Economic factors
  • Job opportunities
  • Living standards
  • Research infrastructure
  • Career advancement
  • Political stability
  • Social services
  • Exodus
  • Incentive programs
  • Competitive salaries
  • Professional migration
  • Investments in education
  • Home countries
  • Corruption
  • Incentive programs
  • Adequate job opportunities
  • Political institutions
  • Lower crime rates
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