IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Cities should be designed to be attractive for local people and foreign tourists. Do you agree or disagree?

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In the contemporary world, the pattern and architecture of buildings change now and
then
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 to keep society to attract towards it. I completely support the statement of constructing buildings and streets full of attraction.
This
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 essay will argue the benefits outweigh the disadvantages.
Firstly
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, individuals think that roads, streets, markets, and houses should be developed with the latest architectural model to attract locals and foreign travellers. There are many positive aspects. As per the report published in the magazine, a large number of tourists prefer to visit famous downtown
due to
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 their unique layouts and numerous famous infrastructures and spend money on local travel, shopping, and staying in hotels which increase the economy of a country.
Moreover
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, they exchange their traditions and languages with the local community. Which creates a healthy and wealthy society.
Secondly
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, a well-developed place with an antique layout and many other facilities provides the best environment to dwell
.
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in.
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 society who live in
such
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 downtown feel confident and calm in
such
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 pleasant environments and they can avail several facilities free of cost.
Furthermore
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, people can avail
other
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of other
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 services for the betterment of their mental and physical health like gyms, clubhouses and other sports areas by living in
such
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 modern areas with their families. In summary, as per the former statements we discussed, numerous foreign travellers go and stay in modern hotels in metropolises which boosts the growth of the country.
Additionally
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, individuals become healthy by availing of free services and creating a good environment with neighbours at
such
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 a social place and they can share their thoughts with each other.

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task achievement
Provide more concrete and relevant examples to support your points. For example, mention specific cities that have successfully attracted tourists through their design.
task achievement
Ensure your arguments are fully developed and clear. Sometimes, a point might seem vague or unsupported.
task achievement
Address potential drawbacks of designing cities mainly for attractiveness, and refute them to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow by using more transition words and linking phrases between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Revise sentences with minor grammatical errors for better clarity and readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
The main points are relevant to the topic and contribute to the development of the argument.
task achievement
The use of a report from a magazine provides some evidence to support the claim about economic benefits.
task achievement
The essay addresses the benefits of designing attractive cities for both locals and tourists, covering multiple aspects like economy, culture, and well-being.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic growth
  • quality of life
  • cultural exchange
  • mutual understanding
  • green spaces
  • public transport
  • environmentally friendly
  • social cohesion
  • inclusive spaces
  • infrastructure
  • historical preservation
  • heritage
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