Air travel causes environmental pollution, so many people believe that there should be an increase in the price of air tickets in order to reduce air traffic. Do you agree or disagree?
Some claim that
air
travel directly pollutes environment
, so increasing the cost of Add an article
the environment
tickets
can decrease the number of flights. Even though I agree with the given statement, in my opinion, other measures also
need to be undertaken in order to mitigate the contamination caused by airplanes
.
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
Firstly
, even though planes provide people with a convenient flying experience throughout the journey, prices
of the Correct article usage
the prices
tickets
can be considered one of the main factors people take into account when they want to purchase them. Planes' tickets
are already quiet
expensive and costly to many individuals, Correct your spelling
quite
therefore
, raising the charge demanded for a ticket can deter passengers to select
another transportation vehicle. Change preposition
from selecting
For example
, middle-class families with an average paycheck hardly afford travelling
Change the verb form
to travel
with
airplane, Change preposition
by
however
, any raise in the cost will make them consider other options as well, such
as busses, cars, trains, and so on. This
tendency will result in decline
in the number of flights over a certain period which might have some positive impacts on Add an article
a decline
earth
.
Capitalize word
Earth
Secondly
, even though aircrafts
might be considered Correct your spelling
aircraft
main
source of pollution, people Change the article
the main
also
should not overlook the effects of other transportation means as well. Hence
, instead
of aiming to reduce the
Correct article usage
apply
air
traffic, government authorities should concentrate on devising new methods to minimize the amount of contamination caused by vehicles, such
as developing a mechanism that can filter the polluted air
, and only after purifying the air
, it can release
to the environment. Wrong verb form
be released
That is
why, authorities should invest some resources in research and development of possible inventions that would be beneficial to all nations.
To conclude
, although
increasing the price of air
tickets
and making them unaffordable to the majority of individuals would be an option to minimize the
Correct article usage
apply
air
pollution, I believe that additional measureas
Correct your spelling
measures
also
should be implemented to provide more sustainable solutions in the long run.Submitted by Narmin on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both the opposing and supporting arguments effectively. However, some points could be clearer, and the use of examples could be more precise and detailed. For example, when discussing alternatives to air travel, it could be beneficial to delve deeper into the environmental benefits of these alternatives.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. Nevertheless, some sentences could be more precise, and transitions between ideas could be smoother. For instance, the paragraph discussing increasing ticket prices could benefit from a clearer transition to the subsequent argument about other measures.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which frame the discussion well. This contributes positively to the overall coherence and cohesion of your piece.
task achievement
You raise valid and relevant points regarding the environmental impact of air travel and potential solutions, which show a good understanding of the task.