IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#future #nobody #newspapers #books
While
 it is widely claimed that printed prints like
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
 and
books
 will no longer be purchased in the near future, others argue that
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 prefer to read
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 through online
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
 since it is free of
charges
Fix the agreement mistake
charge
show examples
. The reasons why I disagree with the statement will be elaborated on in
this
 essay.
To begin
 with, it may
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
 sensible for some to believe that the extinction of a printed medias could
happened
Change the verb form
happen
show examples
 soon.
This
 is possibly because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 emergence of
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
internet
 that
disrupting
Wrong verb form
disrupts
show examples
a conventional types
Correct the article-noun agreement
conventional types
a conventional type
show examples
 of
media
 believing it helps people in saving costs of retrieving
informations
Correct your spelling
information
.
For example
; an online news website
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 you can look
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
up on the
internet
 in a single click without spending a single
dollars
Fix the agreement mistake
dollar
show examples
while
 buying a daily newspaper could cost more than that. Many opponents of
this
 idea might
opposed
Verb problem
say
show examples
 that reading online is not a free
services
Correct the article-noun agreement
service
show examples
,
instead
, it is an extra alternative
ways
Change the noun form
way
show examples
 of expenses of the
media
 in
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
show examples
 world. To simply explain, nothing in
this
 globalization world is money-free,
that is
 why we have
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
internet
 billing added up
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 our monthly expenses
beside
Change preposition
besides
show examples
 water and electricity bills.
As well as
 the services provided online like
books
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
also
 charged at the same rate
of
Change preposition
as
show examples
 printed
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
. Only the intro chapter of a book is free as a sample in order to hook up the reader to buy the book.
Furthermore
, I personally argue in favour of people
still
Correct pronoun usage
who still
show examples
 favor
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
reading offline
media
 seeing that it
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 sense of interaction more than online
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
one
. In
this
 respect, there is
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
evident
Replace the word
evidence
show examples
 showing that
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of people in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society opted for
a printed
Correct the article-noun agreement
printed books
a printed book
show examples
books
 over online
one
Fix the agreement mistake
ones
show examples
 as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
involved
Wrong verb form
involve
show examples
nostaglic
Correct your spelling
nostalgic
 senses
such
 as flipping pages and scents of the inks that contributed to
a particular
Correct the article-noun agreement
particular books
a particular book
show examples
books
while
 the electronic
one
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
absent
these mentioned stimulus
Change the determiner
this mentioned stimulus
these mentioned stimuli
show examples
. In summary,
although
 it is undeniable that
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 has been disrupted in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
media
 fields
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 retrieving data for free sometimes, I am of the opinion that online
media
 cannot completely substitute
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
offline
one
 as it
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
another costly alternative ways
Replace the adjective
another costly alternative way
other costly alternative ways
show examples
 of getting information in
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 world in order to
gaining
Change the verb
gain
show examples
 real updates.
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt well and includes relevant points. However, some ideas could be developed further for clarity and depth. For example, when discussing how online media isn't free, you could have expanded more on the hidden costs and their impact on consumer choices.
general
Pay more attention to grammatical accuracy. There are several instances of incorrect word forms and verb tenses, as well as some awkward phrasing. Additionally, make sure to use articles ('a', 'an', 'the') correctly.
general
Try to use more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to make your writing more engaging. This will also help to convey your arguments more effectively.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively frame your arguments. This is one of the strong points of your essay.
supported main points
You made good use of examples to support your arguments, such as the reference to the cost comparison between online news websites and printed newspapers.
logical structure
Your essay shows a good grasp of the topic and your arguments are logically structured. Each paragraph has a clear main idea and develops it adequately.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • cost-effective
  • cultural value
  • sentimental value
  • reliability
  • distracting
  • access to
  • digital devices
  • internet
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