IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

meals consumed by the USA population focusing on the three typical nutritions comprising sodium, saturated fat and added sugar found in each meal.

#meals #usa #population #three #nutritions #sodium #sugar
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The provided graphical illustrations offer insights into the meals consumed by the
USA
Correct your spelling
US
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 population focusing on the three typical nutritions comprising
sodium
, saturated fat and added sugar found in each meal. The overarching trend highlighted by the diagrams indicates a disproportionate relationship between the nutrients in each meal.
Sodium
 and Saturated fat were two of the nutritions that have nearly similar percentages in each meal with a moderate difference
while
 the added sugar in each meal contained distinct proportions in each meal. For
the
Correct article usage
apply
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similar proportions of
Sodium
 and Saturated fat, Dinner was the meal that
contains
Wrong verb form
contained
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 both of these nutritions in the highest percentage with 43% and 37% respectively. Followed by lunch with nearly
one thirds
Add a hyphen
one-thirds
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 of
Sodium
 and 26% of Saturated fat.
Then
 there are similar proportions of
sodium
 in breakfast and snacks with 14%
while
 there was 21% and 16% in
and
Correct word choice
apply
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Saturated fat. The added sugar was mostly found in snacks with 42%,
however
Add a comma
however,
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 the
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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 meals on dinner, lunch and breakfast contain nearly the same amount with just under a quarter and around one
fifths
Change to a singular noun
fifth
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 and less than
a fifths
Correct the article-noun agreement
fifths
a fifth
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 respectively.
Submitted by pattaraporn.konj on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that you provide a clear conclusion to summarize the main points of your essay, reinforcing your response to the task. This adds to the coherence and completeness of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing the logical structure of your essay. Use clear paragraphing to separate different points or nutrients, ensuring each paragraph has one main idea that is well-supported with examples or data from the graphs.
task achievement
Develop each main point further to provide a more comprehensive response to the task. For instance, elaborate on the implications of the nutrient distributions or compare and contrast the meals in greater detail.
task achievement
A good observational analysis of the data provided in the graphical illustrations, showing the ability to extract and discuss key trends and details.
task achievement
Demonstrates a good understanding of the task and the ability to respond with relevant points and examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical progression of ideas, which makes it easier for the reader to follow the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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