IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. What factors contribute to Job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of Job satisfaction for all workers?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
We are living in an era where economic development makes
people
Use synonyms
 have to
work
Use synonyms
 hard to meet the demands of companies and customers.
Besides
Linking Words
, a growing number of individuals
today
Use synonyms
 suppose that job satisfaction is a decisive factor in personal well-being. I
also
Linking Words
 agree with the above opinion and will present my own opinion below. On the one hand, a suitable working
environment
Use synonyms
 will help
employees
Use synonyms
 improve their efforts in projects and daily
work
Use synonyms
. An
environment
Use synonyms
 full of working tools is the basic thing that
businesses
Use synonyms
 equip
employees
Use synonyms
 to help them ensure effective and safe
work
Use synonyms
 for themselves and their customers.
In addition
Linking Words
, a friendly and fun
environment
Use synonyms
 among colleagues brings a sense of excitement and concentration in research and
work
Use synonyms
 tasks. Accompanied by benefits
such
Linking Words
 as coffee, green areas or increased overtime wages help increase enthusiasm at
work
Use synonyms
 and will help the workforce proactively
work
Use synonyms
 for
businesses
Use synonyms
. In China
today
Use synonyms
,
businesses
Use synonyms
 often proactively provide extra meals or hire taxis for
employees
Use synonyms
 who get off
work
Use synonyms
 late to help them proactively
work
Use synonyms
 overtime. Accompanied by benefits
such
Linking Words
 as coffee, green areas, or increased overtime wages help increase enthusiasm at
work
Use synonyms
 and will help the workforce proactively
work
Use synonyms
 for
businesses
Use synonyms
. In China
today
Use synonyms
,
businesses
Use synonyms
 often proactively add meals or rent taxis for
employees
Use synonyms
 who get off
work
Use synonyms
 late to help them be more proactive in their
work
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the human factor has a strong impact on perceptual satisfaction in the
work
Use synonyms
environment
Use synonyms
. If we meet friendly and sociable colleagues or responsible leaders who care about
employees
Use synonyms
, working together and building memories with
such
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 will retain workers with the company for a long time.
However
Linking Words
, personal feelings are still inevitable. If you are satisfied with your job and current benefits, the factors I mentioned above gradually have no weight. Young
people
Use synonyms
today
Use synonyms
 tend to emphasize
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
perfection in
work
Use synonyms
, creating both a positive and negative signal in
today
Use synonyms
's society. First of all, the positive thing here is that the quality of
work
Use synonyms
 will be significantly improved and
this
Linking Words
 is a testament to the talent of
today
Use synonyms
's young generation. But
along with
Linking Words
 the residual negativity, it brings pressure and perfectionism that makes many
people
Use synonyms
 easily lose their jobs if they do not strive to compete every day. In summary, there are many factors that create job satisfaction for the workforce, but the most important factor is still
people
Use synonyms
's passion and emotions. Someone once said that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 "Passion fuels success", so let's try to find what suits us best and
work
Use synonyms
 to meet our lives.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure to address all parts of the prompt in depth. Although you mentioned factors contributing to job satisfaction and discussed how realistic the expectation is for all workers, the latter part could be elaborated further.
coherence cohesion
Aim for a more explicit structure in paragraphs. Transitional phrases can enhance the coherence between your ideas. For example, using 'First,' 'Next,' and 'Finally' helps guide the reader through your arguments more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Watch for repetitive ideas and redundancy. For example, the concepts regarding benefits like meals and overtime wages were repeated. Keep the essay concise to maintain reader interest and clarity.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is well-crafted, giving a clear idea of the topic at hand and your stance on it. This sets up the rest of the essay nicely.
task achievement
The essay covers various factors contributing to job satisfaction, such as working environment, human interaction, and benefits. This shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The essay successfully uses specific examples, like the practices in Chinese companies, to support your points. This lends credibility to your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • job satisfaction
  • wellbeing
  • contribute
  • meaningful work
  • work-life balance
  • career progression
  • workplace environment
  • recognition
  • constructive feedback
  • compensation
  • benefits
  • job security
  • autonomy
  • skills match
  • interests match
  • variety
  • challenge
  • economic conditions
  • labor market
  • individual expectations
  • job role
What to do next:
Look at other essays: