The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. 

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 

Write at least 150 words.
A glance at the
daigram
Correct your spelling
diagram
provided highlights the procedure of manufacturing
sugar
from
sugar
cane.
Overall
,
this
procedure contains 7 stages and they will be revealed in the following paragraphs.
Initailly
Correct your spelling
Initially
, it causes farmers around 12 to 18 months, to wait for
havesting
Correct your spelling
harvesting
the
sugar
canes
Fix the agreement mistake
cane
show examples
. There are two ways to harvest
sugar
canes
Fix the agreement mistake
cane
show examples
, by
algricultural
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agricultural
truck or by
human
Add an article
the human
show examples
workforce.
Subsquently
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Subsequently
, the
sugar
canes
will be crushed and squeezed by particular machines,
therefore
the
juice
inside
sugar
Correct article usage
the sugar
show examples
canes
will be
avalible
Correct your spelling
available
for the purifying stage. In the purifying stage, the
sugar
cane
juice
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
loaded and
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
press
Wrong verb form
pressed
show examples
though
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
an
Change the article
a
show examples
limestane
Correct your spelling
limestone
filter, which can
seperate
Correct your spelling
separate
bugs or rocks away from
juice
Correct article usage
the juice
show examples
.
Moreover
, the
juice
will be
transfered
Correct your spelling
transferred
transformed
into an evaporator, which heats the
juice
to become syrup.
Finally
, the
sugar
crystals will be separated from the syrup and loaded into column boxes in the centrifuge
as well as
the drying and cooling stages respectively.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, canes, juice with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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