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Band 4.5

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. what are the reasons for this ?how can people research this?

#countries #people #history #house #research
While
 it is widely claimed that
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 in some nations
interested
Add a missing verb
are interested
show examples
 in finding out about the
history
 of their accommodations like
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
 or
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
, others argue that
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 curiosity could potentially be the
answer
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
trends
Fix the agreement mistake
trend
show examples
. Both reasons and how they could research
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
history
 of their house will be elaborated on in
this
 essay.
To begin
 with, it may
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
 sensible for some to believe that
curiosity
Correct article usage
the curiosity
show examples
 of mankind
along with
 the urge to find
answer
Fix the agreement mistake
answers
show examples
 is something special that animals cannot
proceeded
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proceed
show examples
like
Change preposition
with like
show examples
 us.
This
 is possibly because
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
known
Add a missing verb
are known
show examples
 to be the most intellectual organisms on Earth
where
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 we always look for
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
reasons or
reference
Fix the agreement mistake
references
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 things and even past events. Take
history
,
for example
; people
learned
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
 and understand
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
past events
as a result
 of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 curiosity and the action that made them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
get the final
answer
 about something.
Moreover
, in
this
 globalization world and advanced technologies era, it made us possible to seek for the unknown answers that hidden
throughout
Change preposition
for
show examples
 centuries or even longer than that.
Human
Fix the agreement mistake
Humans
show examples
 always record
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
 either
verbal
Change the word
verbally
show examples
 or scribble to pass the information down
Change preposition
to its
show examples
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 descendants.
For example
, numerous records
such
 as
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
 and diaries
aiding
Wrong verb form
aid
show examples
 the research
to
Change preposition
in answering
show examples
answer
 numerous questionable
pasts
Correct your spelling
past
show examples
event
Fix the agreement mistake
events
show examples
 like how
revolutionary
Correct article usage
the revolutionary
show examples
 era evolved in the 18th century.
Furthermore
,
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
s
Correct your spelling
is
also
 a great
resources
Correct the article-noun agreement
resource
show examples
 for us to search for an update and
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
 with a single click. In summary,
although
 it is undeniable that people nowadays pay
attention
Correct quantifier usage
more attention
show examples
 to the
history
 of their home more would possibly
due to
 an instinct
characteristics
Fix the agreement mistake
characteristic
show examples
 which is
curiostity
Correct your spelling
curiosity
, I am of the opinion that the
answer
 to
this
 questioning topic can be possible through written records in order to
satisfied
Change the verb
satisfy
show examples
 one's aims.
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task but can benefit from clearer and more comprehensive ideas. Try to expand and elaborate on your points more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Your essay needs a more logical and clear structure. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly and supports the main ideas with stronger cohesion.
task achievement
Include more specific and relevant examples to support your arguments, which can strengthen the overall effectiveness of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states the topic and sets a foundation for the essay.
supported main points
Including examples like newspapers and diaries adds some depth to your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Historical research
  • Genealogy
  • Architectural styles
  • Heritage
  • Relics
  • Oral history
  • Archival records
  • Museum exhibits
  • Historical societies
  • House tours
  • Renovation projects
  • Original blueprints
  • Careful documentation
What to do next:
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