IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia.

The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia.
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The
given
Verb problem
apply
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pie chart and table illustrate information about the proportion of
tourists
Use synonyms
 in various countries and their different preferences for
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 and activities. A glance at the chart and table provided reveals that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 Europe was the most dominant and
a
Remove the article
apply
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plenty of
tourists
Use synonyms
 went to Europe. In Europe, the duration of journeys
were
Change the verb form
was
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 the longest of others.
While
Linking Words
, in Asia, the most prominent
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 was 5-star
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
. To be more detailed, 35% of visitors were in
US
Correct article usage
the US
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.
US
Correct article usage
The US
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 was the second
popular
Correct quantifier usage
most popular
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 one. Asians and other
tourists
Use synonyms
were
Verb problem
had
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 the lowest rates which was contrasted by 10% and 18%. As can be seen, American and Asian
tourists
Use synonyms
 chose 4-5-star
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
 and for the main
activity
Add a comma
activity,
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 they opted
sightseeing
Change preposition
for sightseeing
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. Asians went on a holiday for 4 days.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, Americans mostly stay for 14 days.
Besides
Linking Words
,
European
Replace the word
Europeans
show examples
 and
tourists
Use synonyms
 from other regions were impressed with Camping and Caravan.
Average
Add an article
The average
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 length of stay of others
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 10 days.
Main
Add an article
The main
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 activity of other regions was surfing.
While
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 Europeans preferred
doing
Unnecessary verb
apply
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swimming and sunbathing
in
Change preposition
during
show examples
 their vacations.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tourists with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Tourist influx
  • Peak season
  • Demographic information
  • Fluctuations
  • Duration of stay
  • Preferred accommodations
  • Analyze
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Compare and contrast
  • Speculate
  • Marketing campaigns
  • Management
  • Data
  • Notable
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