IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011.

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011.
#people #five #european #nations #other’s #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table illustrates the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who lived in five
each
Change preposition
of each
show examples
 other’s
countries
Use synonyms
 in 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, immigrant's first
choice
Use synonyms
 was, to stay in the United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
, where the highest
Use synonyms
people
Correct quantifier usage
number of people
show examples
 migrated and the
Polish
Use synonyms
 was the least preferred country among all five nations. It is conspicuous that the maximum number of folks were migrated to
Germany
Use synonyms
 from other
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 1,198,000 in 2011 and the
second
Use synonyms
 highest was
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
, where 1,037,000 overseas
citizens
Use synonyms
 moved in the same
year
Use synonyms
. The
citizens
Use synonyms
 of Italy (556,000) were the highest
individuals
Correct quantifier usage
number of individuals
show examples
moved
Correct pronoun usage
who moved
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
. The
Polish
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
 were 550,000 moved
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
Unitd
Correct your spelling
United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
 in the same
year
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
third
Use synonyms
 spot was
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Spanish
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
, those were 391,000 moved
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 Britain. Probing ahead, the least gents were migrated 6,000 in
Polish
Use synonyms
 from other
four
Use synonyms
countries
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
second
Use synonyms
 lowest destination
chose
Wrong verb form
chosen
show examples
 by the
citizens
Use synonyms
 was Italy, where only 196,000 made their
residents
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
Spanish
Use synonyms
 was the
third
Use synonyms
 highest
choice
Use synonyms
 of
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
four
Use synonyms
countries
Use synonyms
, only 861,000
people
Use synonyms
 were settled
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ The table illustrates the number of
citizens
Use synonyms
 of each other’s
countries
Use synonyms
 were lived in 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
,
immigrant’s
Fix the agreement mistake
immigrants’
show examples
 first
choice
Use synonyms
 was to stay in the United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
, where the largest
people
Use synonyms
 migrated
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
Polish
Correct your spelling
Poland
show examples
 was the least preferred country among all five nations and Britain
preformed
Correct your spelling
performed
show examples
 lillte nice
also
Linking Words
. It is conspicuous that the
maximumnumber
Correct your spelling
maximum number
 of folks who migrated
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 1,198,000 in 2011 and the
second
Use synonyms
 highest was
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
, where 1,037,000 overseas
citizens
Use synonyms
 moved in the same
year
Use synonyms
. The
citizens
Use synonyms
 of Italy (556,000) were
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
individuals
Correct quantifier usage
number of individuals
show examples
moved
Correct pronoun usage
who moved
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
. The
Polish
Use synonyms
residents
Use synonyms
 were 550,000 moved
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
Unitd
Correct your spelling
United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
 in the same
year
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
third
Use synonyms
 spot was
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Spanish
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
, those were 391,000 moved
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 Britain. Probing ahead, the least gents were moved 6,000 in
Polish
Use synonyms
 from other
four
Use synonyms
countries
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
second
Use synonyms
 lowest destination
chose
Wrong verb form
chosen
show examples
 by the
citizens
Use synonyms
 was Italy, where only 196,000 made their
residents
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
Spanish
Use synonyms
 was the
third
Use synonyms
 highest
choice
Use synonyms
 of
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
four
Use synonyms
countries
Use synonyms
, only 861,000
people
Use synonyms
 were settled
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
.
Submitted by rbtech65 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "additionally, furthermore, in addition, overall".
▼
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, countries, choice, kingdom, polish, germany, second, citizens, year, residents, third, spanish, four with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "illustrates" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "moved" was used 9 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: