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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The chart illustrates a survey result of drinking habits and individuals’ tea and
coffee
Use synonyms
 buying in five different towns in Australia.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that people who visited
cafes
Use synonyms
 for tea or
coffee
Use synonyms
 in
Melbourne
Use synonyms
 took the highest percentages among the place, where percentages of individuals who bought instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 became the majority of fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 buyers throughout the metropolis in four weeks.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
community
Add an article
a community
the community
show examples
 who went to
cafes
Use synonyms
, there are more than 65% of citizens in
Melbourne
Use synonyms
 visited
cafes
Use synonyms
 for tea and
coffee
Use synonyms
 and became the highest number of visitors among the urban areas quite similar to Hobart which just under
Melbourne
Use synonyms
 proportion and followed by Sydney in third position, counted just over 60%.
In Addition
Linking Words
, Brisbane showed about 50% of the population regularly visited
cafes
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
 four weeks.
Moreover
Linking Words
, as the lowest rate of cafe visitors among the cities, Adelaide cafe visitors just counted less than 50%. Turning to
coffee
Use synonyms
 buyers, it is counted approximately 55% of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in Hobart bought instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 higher more than 10% of
a fresh
Correct the article-noun agreement
fresh coffee spenders
a fresh coffee spender
show examples
coffee
Use synonyms
 spenders, followed by Brisbane and Adelaide where people who purchase fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 are lower than convenient
coffee
Use synonyms
, counted quite similar range just below 30%, became the lowest proportion of fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 purchase. In line with
this
Linking Words
,
Melbourne
Use synonyms
 and Sydney took more than 45% of those who bought instant
coffee
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 buyers just presented around 43%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, cafes, melbourne with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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