Some people believe that educational success depends on good teacher, while others believe that students' attitudes are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The Difference of opinions that makes horse races.
Its
believed by some Correct your spelling
It is
people
that academic success
relies on a good educator while
others think that it depends on Correct article usage
a scholar
scholar
Replace the word
scholarly
attitude
, so, in this
essay
we will discuss both sides of view.
A number of Add a comma
essay,
people
think that educational success
count
on a great Correct subject-verb agreement
counts
teacher
justifying that by saying a student
success
greatly depends on how clearly the tutor of people
think that educational success
count on a great teacher
justifying that by saying a student
success
greatly
depends on how clearly the tutor explains Rephrase
apply
furthermore
it's obvious that admiring a teacher
have
a big role Change the verb form
has
on
specifying a Change preposition
in
students
Change noun form
student's
attitude
for example
, when a student
has math teacher
, he will try to do his best in this
subject.
On the other hand
, some people
believe that a student
Change noun form
student's
succeed
depends on his Replace the word
success
attitude
so if he is a careless person, he will not success
, but if he is a serious individual, he will try to do his best to succeed, even if you don't have the greatest Replace the word
succeed
teacher
or the finest materials hence
student
attitude
can be a great motivation to deal with challenges and cope with any situation to achieve the main goals without struggling with the hardships.
In conclusion that
are two different opinions about the factors of Correct pronoun usage
there
student
success
, and my point of view, I got teacher
and student
attitude
work hand in hand to lead to Fix the agreement mistake
attitudes
student
achievement.Submitted by s.nafa2209 on
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introduction conclusion present
Your essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which is great. However, the introduction could be stronger by avoiding informal expressions like 'The difference of opinions that makes horse races'. A more formal approach suits IELTS essays better.
supported main points
While you have addressed both sides of the argument, some ideas need further development. For example, providing a concrete example or study could better support your points about teacher influence or student attitude.
logical structure
The logical flow of your essay can be improved. Some sentences are repetitive and there are grammatical errors that disrupt coherence. Try using transition words to improve the essay's flow, such as 'Additionally', 'Moreover', or 'On the contrary'.
complete response
Your essay covers both perspectives on the topic, showing a balanced view which is important for IELTS tasks.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have made a clear effort to explain why both teachers and student attitudes matter, which indicates a deep understanding of the topic.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion summarizes your stance effectively and ties back to the essay's main points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.