In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In recent times, it is undeniable that because the migration of citizens from the countryside to urban areas is observed worldwide, the population in rural areas is reducing. From my point of view,
this
statement can be both a positive and a negative change.
On the one hand, there are a variety of reasons why this
issue can result in a beneficial side. Firstly
, a decrease in the rural population contributes to the environment in the countryside being better, including pollution and silence. Secondly
, due to
the growth of the city's size, if the government had substantial measurement, the improvement in the urban region would occur. For example
, infrastructure is developed to support and be enough for people such
as transportation, health services and energy.
On the other hand
, it is impossible that there are only advantages to this
situation. Poverty in the cities is a key issue, coming after
this
situation, because the cost of living in the crowded area is higher than that in the quiet area, so many workers cannot afford housing, food and public transport. In addition
, in developing countries worldwide, the city council cannot manage, affecting congestion and a decrease in air quality, so many people suffer either physical or mental diseases.
In conclusion, although
the movement of people from outside to inside the cities can lead to both positive and negative aspects, the disadvantages of this
statement outweigh the advantages. Therefore
, the government should not only respond to the change in the modern world but also
improve the quality of citizens' lives.Submitted by jeans55840 on
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supporting examples
Ensure that each main point in your essay is adequately supported with specific examples or data. For example, when discussing the infrastructure improvements in urban areas, you could provide more detailed statistics or examples of successful cities that have managed this transition well.
coherence
Work on creating more seamless transitions between your ideas and paragraphs. A few of your sentences, especially in the second body paragraph, could benefit from linking phrases to enhance the flow of the essay.
introduction conclusion
While your introduction and conclusion are clear, try to make them slightly more compelling to grab the reader's attention from the beginning and leave a strong impression at the end.
balanced view
Your essay presents a balanced view of the issue by considering both the positive and negative aspects of rural-urban migration.
logical structure
The overall structure of your essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
understanding topic
You show a clear understanding of the topic and your main ideas are relevant to the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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