Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Having difficulties getting enough sleep is a quite big issue and the number of people who cannot get sleep enough is increasing these days.
In addition
, plenty of younger people are suffering from insomnia. It seems that
lack
of sleep makes
this
society harmful. As we know well,
lack
of sleep has negative effects on mental health and body condition. The human mind and body rely on the quality of sleep. Why? The quality of sleep can make healthier the brain because the brain can get rest
while
we are sleeping.
Moreover
, we do not consist of only minds and spirits but bones and muscles. That means, the physical might be influenced a lot by slumber as well.
For example
, deep sleep has significant effects on the growth of muscles and bones period of growth. Everything has cause and effect. What is possible to cause these problems
then
? In my opinion, two reasons are there.
Firstly
, smartphones might be the biggest cause of
lack
of sleep these days. Over the past 10 years, using smartphones has been increasing across the world rapidly. The real problem is that we use
this
device until before getting sleep.
According to
eminent scholars, “smartphones interrupt in getting sleep deeply.
Whereas
, the biggest cure for reducing stress is sleep.”
Secondly
, the quality of sleep depends on what we eat all day.
For example
, junk
foods
are likely to interrupt our sleep because they contain low-quality nutrients. In conclusion, for the reasons mentioned above, I personally believe that we should remedy our bad habits or routine
such
as not using smartphones for 2 hours before going to bed and reducing fresh
foods
instead
of junk
foods
or convenience
foods
. If we can stick to
this
plan and execute it continuously, getting enough sleep would be straightforward. The
lack
of sleep can be solved partially
Submitted by ryujaekwang0928 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
You have demonstrated a good understanding of the topic and addressed all parts of the task. However, try to use more specific examples to explain your points more clearly. For instance, mention particular studies or surveys that support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure to maintain a logical flow throughout the essay. Some ideas could be more clearly connected. For example, the transition between the causes of lack of sleep and the solutions could be smoother.
introduction conclusion present
You have a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively frame the issues and solutions related to lack of sleep.
task achievement
Your essay covers a range of ideas related to the task, and your main points are generally well-supported and relevant.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Insomnia
  • Sleep deprivation
  • Sleep disorders
  • Sleep quality
  • Fatigue
  • Exhaustion
  • Restless
  • Restorative sleep
  • REM sleep
  • Circadian rhythm
  • Sleep hygiene
  • Napping
  • Sleep duration
  • Melatonin
  • Sleep-inducing
  • Drowsiness
  • Sleep disturbances
  • Obstructive sleep apnea
  • Snoring
  • Sleepwalking
  • Sleep talking
  • Shift work
  • Sleeping pills
  • Sleep aid
  • Relaxation techniques
  • Meditation
  • Deep breathing
What to do next:
Look at other essays: