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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.
#proportion #population #three #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given line chart illustrates how the ratio of the
population
Use synonyms
 over 65 changed from 1940 to 2040 in Japan,
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and the 
USA
Use synonyms
 respectively. During the period, Japan will be expected to arrive at 27%
population
Use synonyms
 aged 65 in 2040, higher than
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and 
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
, which will
stands
Change the verb form
stand
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 at 25% and 24% respectively. Though Japan
was
Verb problem
had
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 the lowest proportion of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 over 65 between 1940 and 2005 less than 5%, it increased steadily
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 10% in 2030 and rose significantly and higher than
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
stands
Wrong verb form
standing
show examples
 at 25% in 2035. The proportion of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 aged 65 in
Sweden
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 and
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 started at 7% and 9% in 1940. Both increased steadily and the 
USA
Use synonyms
 was always higher than
Sweden
Use synonyms
.
Until
Change preposition
In
show examples
 1995, 
Sweden
Use synonyms
 overtook the 
USA
Use synonyms
 and arrived at 14%. After 1995, the 
USA
Use synonyms
 remained at around 14% until 2018
reincreased
Verb problem
increased
show examples
, reaching 24% in 2040,
whereas
Linking Words
Sweden
Use synonyms
increased
Verb problem
apply
show examples
fluctuated and arrived at 25%
finally
Linking Words
 in 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, the ratio of
population
Use synonyms
 aged 65 in three different countries is 
Linking Words
similarly
Change the word
similar
show examples
 in 2040.
Submitted by fiasngs on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, sweden, usa with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stands" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • aging population
  • proportion
  • elderly
  • significant increase
  • surpass
  • gradual increase
  • crucial period
  • rapid increase
  • healthcare advancements
  • lower birth rates
  • projections
  • adjustments in social services
  • demographic dynamics
  • lifestyle choices
  • trends
  • notable
  • potentially
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