Zoos are sometimes seen as necessary but poor alternatives to a natural environment. Discuss some of the arguments for and against keeping animals in zoos as an IELTS topic and give your own opinion.

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The decrease in an animal's natural habitat prompted the development of
zoos
as both an entertainment source and a place where
animals
can live. Some believe that keeping
animals
in a zoo can be unethical as
humans
would be taking these
animals
away from their environments and forcing them into a cage.
However
, I would argue that
zoos
and any other form of animal enclosures are the only available alternative living spaces for
animals
in the wild.
Firstly
, people tend to believe that
animals
can live longer when left in the wild without human tampering.
This
is solely based on the fact that they have lived longer than
humans
do and have gotten used to it.
Therefore
, keeping them in
zoos
is the same as forcing them into a cheap recreation of their natural habitat.
However
, what they fail to realize is how climate change and environmental problems have harmed ecosystems to the point of no return. Their natural habitat has been destroyed, and
that is
why animal enclosures are their only option. It may be a cheap recreation, but at least
humans
can ensure their needs are fulfilled.
In addition
, some believe that putting
animals
inside
a cages
Correct the article-noun agreement
a cage
cages
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for human entertainment is unethical and can put them through physical and psychological harm.
Animals
in
zoos
are unwillingly captured and shown to visitors like a trophy, and
this
undermines their rights as living beings.
While
I agree that it is unethical, there is simply no other way because these
zoos
need money and resources to take care of the
animals
they keep. I believe that it is a good trade-off to ensure that the species stays alive, and oftentimes significant measures are taken to prolong an animal's health. Taking everything into consideration,
although
keeping
animals
in
zoos
is not the perfect solution, it can help ensure an animal's
wellbeing
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
without harming
humans
.
Submitted by kelly on

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task achievement
To further improve clarity, consider including more specific examples or studies that illustrate the points you are making. For instance, citing a specific zoo that has successfully preserved an endangered species would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
There are minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings which, if corrected, could make the essay more polished. For example, the phrase "animals can live longer when left in the wild without human tampering" could be rephrased for clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in maintaining a cohesive structure.
task achievement
You provide a well-rounded discussion that covers both sides of the argument and offers your own opinion clearly.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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