Some people think that job satisfaction is more important while other people think that a stable job is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is true that
,
the Remove the comma
apply
jobs
play a crucial role in people
's lives. However
, some people
say that job
satisfaction
is of utmost importance
while
others say that fixed employment
is a vital aspect. This
essay discusses both viewpoints and I strongly agree with the former opinion for the following reasons.
On the one hand, job
satisfaction
is crucial in People
's employment
because this
bring
more Change the verb form
brings
pleasures
even if they earn a little amount of salary. Fix the agreement mistake
pleasure
This
is because,
Remove the comma
apply
satisfaction
of
the Change preposition
with
job
provides
avoids psychological issues Verb problem
apply
such
as Strees
and depression. Correct your spelling
stress
For example
, many persons are
Verb problem
people
suffered
Wrong verb form
suffer
by
Change preposition
from
over work-load
and target achievements, but if they are working their Correct your spelling
overwork-load
desire
Replace the word
desired
job
that lead
to providing more Change the verb form
leads
satisfaction
. Noodless
to say, Correct your spelling
Needless
satisfaction
Add an article
the satisfaction
a satisfaction
of
Change preposition
with
the
Correct article usage
apply
employment
is of utmost importance
of
Change preposition
to
the
humankind.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, retain of
Wrong verb form
retaining
the
Correct article usage
apply
works
is a vital aspect Fix the agreement mistake
work
in
Change preposition
of
people
lives because it brings Change noun form
people's
stable of
Replace the word
stability
the
income and Correct article usage
apply
permement
Correct your spelling
permanent
employment
, so, Correct article usage
the employed
employed
do not care not about financial problems. Replace the word
employees
This
is, steady of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
employment
creates worker's
relaxation, and they Fix the agreement mistake
workers'
neither
afraid to Verb problem
are not
be looking
Wrong verb form
look
to
other Change preposition
for
jobs
in
every month not Change preposition
apply
degrade
Fix the infinitive
to degrade
of
promotions. Change preposition
apply
For instance
, the
government employees always focus on Correct article usage
apply
refaining
their Correct your spelling
refining
refraining
retaining
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
due to
they do not look Jobs
in certain periods, and looking Change preposition
for Jobs
new
Change preposition
for new
jobs
also
is difficult in
nowadays. Change preposition
apply
Then
, all workers like to hold their position
.
In Conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
positions
although
job
pleasures are the most paramount importance
because this
helps to being
a Verb problem
have
bealthy
lifestyle without affecting any psychological issues, retaining Correct your spelling
healthy
wealthy
employment
is a significant factors
on the grounds it avoids looking for new Change the noun form
factor
jobs
frequently and provides income assurance. However
, in my opion
, about Correct your spelling
opinion
this
, job
satisfaction
is of utmost importance
because it brings more happiness to employees.Submitted by reanudeepan on
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task achievement
While your introduction and conclusion are generally effective, make sure to refine the thesis statement to clearly cover both views discussed in the essay and your personal stance. This can make your task achievement stronger.
coherence cohesion
Try to enhance the logical flow of ideas between and within paragraphs. Using more transitional phrases can help strengthen coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Avoid minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to ensure clarity and comprehensiveness of ideas. Proofreading can be very beneficial.
task achievement
Your essay adequately addresses both views and offers a personal opinion, which is crucial for a high task achievement score.
task achievement
You consistently use relevant examples to support your points, which helps make your arguments more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion clearly frame the essay, giving it a well-rounded structure.