IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the contemporary world, some governments believe that advanced sports centres will encourage professional huntsmen to gain achievements for their country. In discrepancy, ordinary people feel a deficit of sports
outfit
Fix the agreement mistake
outfits
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 and suitable installations to train daily. In
this
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 essay, I'll examine both the profitable and mischievous it has on society. To commence, it's irrefutable that better results and success can be reached under the guidance of a good trainer and in the applicable
well- equipped
Correct your spelling
well-equipped
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 terrain.
also
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, the government should fund structure and elite athletes to acquire a global character for their nation.
Accordingly
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, countries believe to have profitable benefits in
this
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 competitive world.
On the other hand
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, it's vital to make up public sports grounds and equip
residers
Replace the word
residents
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 with a special force to reduce the healthcare burden that will attack multitudinous conditions,
similar
Correct word choice
such
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 as rotundity, heart stroke, heart attack, and internal conditions will be enhanced.
likewise
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, it'll give job or hobbyhorse openings, and maintain a healthy vibe,
therefore
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, individualities will be healthier and fitter. really, indulging in charming rest hobbies will vastly reduce felonious statistics because it'll impact adolescents ’ geste and time conditioning.
To conclude
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, In my perception, erecting
up
Change preposition
apply
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transnational and original dégagé bias will profit the country in different ways. Great prices would escalate the frugality and business,
whereas
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 a domestic wholesome life will mileage people inside the state as well.

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coherence cohesion
Clarify your main points. Ensure each paragraph centers on a single idea and that this idea is clearly stated and developed throughout the paragraph.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. This makes your points stronger and more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, setting the context and summarizing your points effectively.
task achievement
Your essay covers both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach.
task achievement
You have made an effort to explain the benefits of both specialized facilities and public sports grounds.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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