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Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar chart below gives information on the percentage of british people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The bar chart below gives information on the percentage of british people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.
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The percentage of British people donating
money
 to charity by age intervals for the years 1990 and 2010 is depicted in the bar chart given.
Overall
,in 1990,the largest proportion of humans ,aged 36-50 gave
money
 to charity organisations but in 2010,
this
 was valid for mankind
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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aged between 51-65.
On the other hand
, it is observed that
money
 donated to folk who are in the 18-25 range was the least in both 1990 and 2010.
Although
 there was a similar trend,illustrating a substantial incline in the percentage of
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
 donating
bill
Fix the agreement mistake
bills
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 to benevolent societies from 18 to 50 ages in both years,people who are aged between 51 and 65 and who are older than >65 were on a larger scale to give
money
 to
endownment
Correct your spelling
endowment
endowments
.
Moreover
,the largest growth in the percentage of people being helpful to other humans was seen from the 18-25 to 26-35 range in 2010 with about 17%. In spite of a peak reached in humans who are auxiliary to others in 1990,a gradual decline was observed in
65
Correct article usage
the 65
show examples
 age group from over 40% to 30%.
However
, a steep escalation was displayed in mankind donating payment to
fund
Wrong verb form
funds
show examples
 from 5% to approximately 40%,following a moderate fall back to about 35%.
Submitted by kabzop on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words money with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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