It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician.

Many people believe that some individuals are born with special
talents
,
such
as in sports or music,
while
others are not.
However
, there is
also
an opinion that any child can be taught to become a good sportsperson or musician. In my opinion, some people may have inborn
talents
, but that does not mean others can't achieve
success
through effort. On the one hand, it is understandable why many people think that
talent
is innate. In reality, some individuals have special abilities from birth. The nature of human
talents
with necessary characteristics actually
offer
Change the verb form
offers
show examples
assistance
children
Change preposition
to children
show examples
to reach modern statures in terms of their potential as talented artists, artists, or academic achievers. For occasion, medal-earning sprinting competitors are as a rule characterized by long legs and brief torsos, compared to those with other body sorts. For
further
illustration,
Piblo
Correct your spelling
Pablo
Picasso showed art skills as a child. In these cases,
talent
is genetic and not everyone possesses it. What’s more, individuals with inborn
talents
usually find it easier to succeed in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
On the other hand
, there is the view that any child can become a good sportsperson or musician through education and training. They argue that persistent practice and learning can help children develop skills and achieve
success
.
For instance
, many famous/ eminent musicians and athletes started with no apparent
talent
but achieved great
success
through hard work. Bills Gate still had to go the extra mile as he worked more than 18 hours per day for a long period of time before the advent of Microsoft
although
he had had the ability to create software since he was 13. Modern educational methods
also
support
talent
development through intensive training programs and dedicated guidance. In conclusion, in case someone has inborn
talent
or not, anyone can achieve
success
in sports or music if they receive a proper education as effort and dedication can sometimes outplay inborn competence. Both natural
talent
and effort are important, and combining them will yield the best results.
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on

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coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure, ensure all points are connected smoothly with appropriate transitions. Sometimes, the essay jumps from one idea to the other too quickly.
task achievement
More relevant and specific examples that precisely support your points will strengthen your argument. The example of Bill Gates, while useful, could be more directly tied to the topic of innate talent and learned skill.
task achievement
Correct minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to improve clarity. For example, 'Piblo Picasso' should be 'Pablo Picasso', 'Bills Gate' should be 'Bill Gates', and 'artists, artists' should be modified to just one 'artists'.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay and provide a clear stance.
task achievement
The essay shows a balanced approach by discussing both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are generally coherent and easy to follow, providing a logical flow to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innate abilities
  • genetic make-up
  • inherent aptitude
  • nurturing environment
  • rigorous training
  • proficient
  • initial advantage
  • consistent practice
  • perseverance
  • quality training
  • prodigies
  • dedication
  • long-term success
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