IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems.

Stay in
Correct your spelling
Studying
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 abroad and
to be spoken
Wrong verb form
speaking
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 a
language
Use synonyms
 except
mother
Correct pronoun usage
your mother
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 tongue could be a great challenge
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 public and practical events. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and I am going to elaborate my take on
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
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 forthcoming paragraphs. Internationally there are lots of job opportunities for foreign
workers
Use synonyms
at
Change preposition
in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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developed countries and most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people from
third world
Add a hyphen
third-world
show examples
 countries
are
Verb problem
have
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 migrated to
economical
Change the word
economically
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 rich countries.
Therefore
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, before
enter
Change the verb form
entering
show examples
 the job most skilled
workers
Use synonyms
 must pass the
language
Use synonyms
 proficiency exams. Because we need to fulfil communication skills for customised with future buyers.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, as an example if a person qualified as a health care worker, there may be patients from rural or countryside , lots of villagers speak
there
Correct your spelling
their
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 native
language
Use synonyms
 and they
do
Verb problem
are
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 not familiar with international communication. So, job
holder
Fix the agreement mistake
holders
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became
Verb problem
had
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 unexpected difficulties with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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sharing ideas and
take
Wrong verb form
taking
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note
Fix the agreement mistake
notes
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by
Change preposition
on
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history
Add an article
the history
a history
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 of the disease.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the
non skilled
Add a hyphen
non-skilled
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 worker
also
Linking Words
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
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 to learn as much as ,
because
Correct word choice
apply
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 all
workers
Use synonyms
 not only
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 clerical
setting
Fix the agreement mistake
settings
show examples
. There
ate
Verb problem
were
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labours
Correct your spelling
labourers
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,
cleaners
Correct word choice
and cleaners
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 as well. They should influent as much as to manage commands.
Therfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
, they
also
Linking Words
 should
be study
Change the verb form
study
show examples
 the
language
Use synonyms
 where they plan to fly.
According to
Linking Words
 my personal
experiences
Add a comma
experiences,
show examples
 it is very difficult to demonstrate the practical
due to
Linking Words
 lack of
language
Use synonyms
 proficiency.
Although
Linking Words
, we are the best we become unsuccessful carry out the presentations.
As a result
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, our performances might be not enough to deal with them. Sometimes we have to
dropped
Change the form of the verb
drop
show examples
 down and
to be starting
Wrong verb form
start
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in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
zero. In a nutshell, to
settled
Change the form of the verb
settle
show examples
 down as a foreign worker
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad it is difficult to company with customers, co-
Use synonyms
workers
Correct your spelling
co-workers
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 as well. So it is
identical
Add an article
an identical
show examples
 social and practical failure.

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coherence cohesion
Focus on organizing your ideas in a more structured way. Use paragraphs effectively by ensuring each one presents a single main idea. For better coherence, link your paragraphs using appropriate transition words.
clarity
Work on grammatical accuracy and sentence construction. This will help in conveying your ideas more clearly and reduce confusion. Consider practicing more with language proficiency exercises or seeking feedback from peer reviews.
task achievement
Expand upon your examples and explanations. Make sure that each point is clearly explained and well supported with specific examples. This will enhance the completeness and persuasiveness of your argument.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and provides a complete response. You’ve identified important problems related to living in a foreign country and needing to use a foreign language.
task achievement
The essay contains some relevant examples to support your main points, especially the example related to healthcare workers facing language barriers with rural patients.
coherence cohesion
You have made an effort to provide an introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the essay.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • linguistic proficiency
  • cross-cultural communication
  • miscommunication
  • social integration
  • linguistic alienation
  • cultural dissonance
  • language acquisition
  • communication breakdown
  • interpreter services
  • language courses
  • bilingualism
  • multilingualism
  • language barrier
  • effective communication
  • cultural assimilation
What to do next:
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