The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

#bar #line #temperatures #suit #sales #york #first #months #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The chart here illustrates the average temperatures of New York

in contrast

to the revenue generated by the selling of bathing

suit

Fix the agreement mistake

suits

show examples

in the span of six

months

, from January to June, in the year of 2012. The average

temparature

Correct your spelling

temperature

was calculated in

fahrenheit

Change the capitalization

Fahrenheit

show examples

and the

sale

of the bathing suite in hundred

thousands

Change to singular

thousand

show examples

dollars

. To summarise, the

temperature

shows an upward trend,

while

the bathing suit

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

increased in

first

Correct article usage

the first

show examples

four consecutive

months

, followed by a sharp declining trend in the

last

two

months

. The

temperature

of the January month was just above 30

degree

Fix the agreement mistake

degrees

show examples

fahrenheit

Change the capitalization

Fahrenheit

show examples

, at that time the money earned by selling the suits was at 1 million

dollars

. In the following month, the

temperature

dropped very slightly ,

however

, the

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

increased

around

Change preposition

to around

show examples

25 hundred thousand

dollars

Change preposition

show examples

March, the

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

hit the 1.5 million mark, when the

temperature

spiked to almost 40

degree

Fix the agreement mistake

degrees

show examples

fahrenheit

Change the capitalization

Fahrenheit

show examples

However

, the biggest

half yearly

Add a hyphen

half-yearly

show examples

sale

was during April, at almost 3 million

dollars

, when the

temperature

was around 50

degree

Fix the agreement mistake

degrees

show examples

fahrenheit

Change the capitalization

Fahrenheit

show examples

. The

temperature

kept rising in the following two

months

. But the

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

dropped below in May, below 1 mil

Submitted by mostakahmedfaysal on Thu Jul 11 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words months, fahrenheit, sale, dollars, temperature with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

▼

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

191 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

average monthly temperatures
bathing suit sales
correlation
monthly breakdown
significant changes
warmest months
speculate
trends
increase in temperature
contrasting
predictive speculation
general trends
specific months

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The bar and line chart below shows average monthly temperatures and bathing suit sales in New York for the first 6 months of 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

some people think that social media sites have a huge negative effect on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Famous sportsmen earn a lot more money than those in other professions. Although sport is important in our lives, everyone should be equal and such big incomes of sport professionals are unjustified. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Everyone should adopt a vegetarian diet because eating meat can cause serious health problems. Do you agree or disagree?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?