Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try cooporate more rather that competing against each other. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In
this
essay, I will discuss arguments from
both
sides before stating why I strongly advocate that
both
competition and
co-operation
Correct your spelling
cooperation
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play a significant role in
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
life
. A more nuanced picture is necessary.
To begin
with, proponents of constant
clash
at
work
, at school, and in daily
life
can be considered as a good thing;
reason
Add an article
the reason
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being,
a
Correct word choice
that a
show examples
constant
clash
motivates people to perform tremendously among
the
Change the word
their
show examples
peers.
For instance
, a
clash
among
peer
Fix the agreement mistake
peers
show examples
leads to brainstorming of ideas and
reinforce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reinforces
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individuals to
peak
Verb problem
reach
show examples
their potential, which helps them to reach their
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
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.
Additionally
,
clash
helps to reinforce critical thinking and logical thinking among humans.
On the contrary
, some believe proponents of
co-operation
Correct your spelling
cooperation
show examples
among
peer
Fix the agreement mistake
peers
show examples
at
work place
Correct your spelling
the workplace
show examples
, at educational
institute
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institutes
show examples
, and
daily
Change preposition
in daily
show examples
life
is considered to be a way better approach than competition, as collaboration between people
tend
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tends
show examples
to lead a better
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
than a solo performance.
For instance
,
while
working on a group project, humans are expected to
work
in a team, rather than working alone as these projects require great precision and different skills, and it is possible that one can lack those skills
while
working on projects. It is believed that
team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
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work
helps to improve efficiency and builds working relationships.
Additionally
, collaboration boosts productivity, boosts morale, and enhances personal growth.
To conclude
, from the arguments and examples given, I firmly believe that
both
competition and cooperation play a significant role in
Correct article usage
an individuals
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individuals
Change noun form
individual's
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life
, depending on the
work
a person should wisely,
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
what
time
Correct your spelling
type
show examples
of approach should be used,
while
some
work
requires you to be best and some
work
requires you
give
Add the particle
to give
show examples
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best
work
,
both
things are completely different because
sometime
Replace the word
some time
show examples
to grow efficiency people are expected to
work
in
team
Add an article
a team
show examples
as it leads to better results.
Therefore
, I believe
both
sides have their own merits and demerits so,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
should be
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
wisely
according to
the
work
approach.
Submitted by somynarain12 on

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task achievement
While the introduction clearly states the intention to discuss both views and provide your opinion, it could be more engaging or precise in its wording. For example, 'constant clash' could be rephrased to 'constant competition' for clarity.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences are a bit convoluted and could be simplified for better readability. Breaking complex sentences into shorter ones can help improve clarity.
task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples and avoiding repetitive phrasing. For instance, instead of using 'proponents of constant clash,' try varying the expressions to maintain interest and clarity.
task achievement
The essay does a good job of addressing both views, which shows a balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
There are effective transitions between paragraphs, which help maintain good flow and coherence.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a clear opinion, enhancing the overall cohesiveness of the essay.
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